The Curtis Saga Part Three: College
by aims80
Summary: **COMPLETED** Pony goes to college and you'll see the adventures don't stop! Sorry about the bad summary, but please R&R anyway!
1.

[A/N. I know I haven't yet completed my other outsiders story, but the idea for this one was in my head and I had to get it down. Once I've got this chapter up I'll continue and finish off my other one! Let me know what you think of this one though, as I'm not too sure whether or not it's any good!]  
  
ONE:  
  
"Someone once said that from death dawns life, and I have to agree with this. An event which brings such terrible heartbreak and despair, can also bring something else-it can also bring love and closeness. When my parents died when we were only young it left myself, my oldest brother Darryl-known as Darry, and my other older brother Sodapop, known as Soda all alone. We struggled to find our footing.." I stopped writing almost angrily, and balled up the paper and threw it across the small room towards the waste- paper basket. It bounced off the edge and landed next to the basket. "DAMN!" I swore.  
  
Taking a deep breath I got up and went over to the window, where I leant on the ledge looking down onto the grounds below. It was one of the last days of summer, and the students were taking full advantage of that fact. All except me of course. For some reason the essay we'd been assigned in "Introduction to Writing" about the most important event in our lives had me stuck. I guess that seems pretty strange when I consider I've never had trouble writing about my life before. Only a few years back I handed in what had probably won the title for the world's largest English theme, dealing with the death of two of my friends!  
  
With a sigh I glanced at the clock by my bed. Quarter to Three. It wasn't really worth me sitting back down at the desk to try and get the essay started considering I had to meet my girlfriend Mandy by the library at ten past three. Instead I grabbed my keys and wallet and headed out. As I started out the front door of the dorm I passed my roommate on his way back inside.  
  
"Wow! He's managed to unattach himself from his desk and books!"  
  
"Ha, ha." I muttered. "If you must know I've got to meet Mandy soon."  
  
"Mandy." He grinned. "What I want to know is how someone like you, has someone like her? What's your secret Ponyboy?"  
  
"It's not being an arsehole." I replied. Not that Eric was a complete arsehole; he simply was the exact opposite of me. I came to college on a scholarship which I was determined to keep. He came to college on the orders of his parents. I cared about my education. He didn't.  
  
Eric snorted and clapped me on the back. "That's why I haven't picked up since I got here. Three whole weeks and no woman! Thanks for the tip stud." He teased.  
  
"No problems. Good luck." I replied, with a slight grin. Back home Eric would have been what we classed as a soc- a social. Rich kids who drove around in their expensive cars causing trouble, especially with our lot- the greasers.  
  
"Oh I forgot!" Eric said, suddenly. "Your brother called for you yesterday."  
  
"Which one?" I asked.  
  
"Soda?" Eric repeated. "Pony what's with your parents and the strange names anyway? Were they hippies?"  
  
"Hippies?" I repeated and laughed. "Hardly. They were just original."  
  
Eric shrugged, and started to walk off, and then he turned back. "I guess it's a lot more original that Eric James Hollingworth the fourth isn't it? And even more so, it doesn't have the same expectation as mine does. Every man in our family has graduated college and gone into the family business so I'm expected to do exactly the same. Originality has a lot going for it Pony."  
  
As I walked towards the library I pondered what Eric had just said. For the first time in three weeks my roommate had shown his vulnerable, and human side. My brothers had never really placed any great pressure on me to go to college, although I think it was always just assumed that I would. Darry could have gone to college, but he ended up getting a job to support Soda and I instead. Soda, on the other hand, always said he would never have managed to get to college, but he's not exactly dumb. He just isn't into learning. He left school as soon as he could and got a job in a garage near us. So I think, subtly, my brothers expected me to be the one in the family to go onto college. I recalled Soda telling me once I was the smart one. My thoughts disappeared when I saw Mandy standing out the front of the library waiting for me. Mandy and I got together when I returned from a trip we'd won to England, and we've been together ever since. The joking comments Eric made earlier about how someone like Mandy would be with someone like me are thoughts I often have myself. Mandy was part of the socs back home, and therefore you'd think that there would be no chance of us being together. But she was different to any of the other socs-she didn't care about labels or money! Like she told me on my first day back at school after the trip: "I like you for you Pony. Ever since I met you I have."  
  
"Hey," She said greeting me with a kiss. "Did you get a good start on your essay?"  
  
"Don't ask." I said.  
  
"I already have." Mandy replied. "What's the problem with it?"  
  
"I don't know what to write exactly. The most important event in my life for gods sake? How many have there been which could qualify on some level?" I said, with a sigh. "Maybe I'm not cut out to be a writer."  
  
"Yeah, maybe you're not. Writings not for everyone Pony. I'm sure there's something else you could do-like work in a supermarket or something." Mandy replied, and I glanced at her in shock. She knew perfectly well that the only ambition I had in life was to be a writer!  
  
A grin spread across her face. "I was just teasing you Pony. Look I'm sure there are plenty of other people in the class struggling with the essay too. You'll work it out. And you'll be a great writer!"  
  
I laughed too, and grabbed her hand. "Come on, let's go get a coffee and something to eat. Thinking has made me hungry, and I bet you're hungry too after two hours of history."  
  
"I am!" Mandy agreed, and we started across the grass towards our favorite café. 


	2. 

TWO:  
  
"So how are you and Eric getting along now?" Mandy asked as we sat outside at the café.  
  
"Better I guess. We just have to accept that we are two completely different types of people and we're rooming together for the year whether we like it or not!" I admitted. "And his teasing is a lot more good natured than it was at first. How's your roomie going?"  
  
Mandy swallowed a big bite of her chicken salad roll and nodded. "Yeah, it's getting better. So long as she stops sneaking guys back into the room late at night. Does she think I can't hear what they're doing? It's not that big a room!"  
  
I laughed. Mandy's roommate, Christy, had seemed like a nice enough girl to me when I first met her, but then I found out she was completely obsessed with guys and poor Mandy never knew when she'd walk in on Christy and some new conquest. But Mandy had laid down the law about the fact that it was her room too, and she didn't want to see that kind of thing, and now Christy was starting to bring guys back less. I'd jokingly suggested they make a timetable as to who got the room when, but Mandy had made a face. "Don't even joke about that Pony! It could come to something like that for all I know."  
  
I drained the last of my coffee and popped the last of my chips into my mouth. I'd just decided that my essay was going to be on Mandy, and how we met and how we fell in love just like that.  
  
"Did I tell you I saw Randy the other day?" Mandy asked me, and I nearly choked on my chip.  
  
Randy had been the best friend of Bob, the soc one of my best friends Johnny had killed. Of course Bob had completely asked for it. He and his friends got a real kick out of jumping greasers like us, and when he was holding my head under the water Johnny had reacted instantly. After the whole thing was over I spoke to Randy occasionally, but they were generally pretty stilted conversations. After all, no matter whose fault it was, I'd been partly responsible for his best friend's deaths!  
  
"No. Here?" I asked. I hadn't known anyone else had applied for UCLA like Mandy and I had. I had two main reasons, the first was that the writing program here was one of the best in the country, and the second was that I thought it might do me good to get away from home and my brothers for a bit. I'm not bagging them or anything, but sometimes they can get a bit much! Mandy's reasons were similar-she wouldn't mind going to college on the other side of the country from her parents!  
  
"Yeah, he's here." Mandy replied. "He was telling me he wants to go to law school."  
  
"Law school hey?" I mused. "That would be pretty hard."  
  
"Well he's a pretty smart guy you know." Mandy said. "Anyway, he was saying if we're not doing anything maybe we could have a drink or something on Friday night?"  
  
I raised my eyebrows. Why on earth would Randy want to have a drink with me? It seemed pretty strange. I realised Mandy was waiting for my answer, and I shrugged. "Maybe. Did he say why?"  
  
"No. Why would he have?" Mandy asked, and then she frowned. "Look Pony the whole thing with Bob was a few years ago now. It's over. I'm sure Randy's more mature about things now including that."  
  
I shrugged again. "Maybe he is." I muttered, and then I changed the subject. "Anyway have you decided about cheerleading tryouts?"  
  
"I don't know." Mandy admitted. "There's so many girls here who are bound to be a lot better than I am!"  
  
"Ha! That's what you think." I said. "I saw you back at school and if there was another girl on the team who was anywhere near as good as you I'd like to have seen them! Even Cherry who thought she was the bees knees was nowhere as good as you, and she only got made captain because she'd been there a lot longer than you!"  
  
"Well I'll think about it." Mandy said. "How's that?"  
  
"It'll have to do." I said.  
  
Mandy glanced at her watch. "Pony I've got to run. I've got to meet one of the guys from Sociology to start work on our assignment. We've been assigned partners." She said.  
  
I nodded. "Okay, have fun and don't work too hard."  
  
She got up lightly, and slung her backpack over her shoulder. "I won't." She said, kissing me on the forehead before hurrying off. I watched her walk across campus, and then sighed and ordered another coffee- this time to take away, and then went back to my room to try and get some of the damn essay done. However as I walked into the room I realised I was meant to be calling Soda back, and instead I picked up the phone and rang.  
  
Soda's voice sounded funny when he answered the phone. "'Lo?" He asked.  
  
"Soda it's me, Ponyboy!" I said.  
  
"Pony!" Soda repeated. "It's not that I'm not glad to hear from you kiddo, but did you forget there was a time difference here?"  
  
Oops. "Sorry Soda, so how you been?" I asked.  
  
"Yeah not bad. Two-Bit's been round here a bit lately. I think he's having a lot more problems with his olds. Especially now that he's finished school and all." Soda said.  
  
"Does he have a job?" I asked.  
  
"Not yet. He says he's looking, but who knows how hard." Soda replied.  
  
"And how about Darry? How's he?" I asked.  
  
"Working hard as usual." Soda replied. "Although he might not be working quite as hard in the future." There was a teasing tone in his voice when he said that, sort of a "I know something you don't know" tone.  
  
"Why is that?" I demanded.  
  
"Darry's got a girlfriend!" Soda exclaimed.  
  
I almost dropped the phone. It wasn't that Darry wasn't good looking or anything, it was simply that he worked too hard. I'd always figured he would never get around to finding a girlfriend because of his long hours at work. "Well what's she like then? Is she nice? Is she pretty? Is she our type, you know a greaser?" I fired.  
  
"Whoa Pony!" Soda said laughing. "Yes she's nice, and she's pretty enough, and she is a greaser. She's over here quite a bit, but that suits me fine since she can cook a hell of a lot better than I can."  
  
"Wow." I said. "I just can't believe its Darry with the girlfriend not you."  
  
Soda was silent for a moment, and when he spoke his voice was casual, almost too casual. "I don't want a girlfriend thanks Pony. I've been through that all with Sandy and I don't want to go through it all again!"  
  
"Soda!" I said. "You'll find someone better than Sandy!"  
  
"Yeah, well maybe one day." Soda said. I knew that the incident with Sandy had hurt him a lot, but I still didn't think it hurt this much. "Anyway Pony, I hate to be rude, but I've got to go."  
  
"Right, the time difference thing." I replied. "Well don't forget to say hey to Darry for me. And Two-Bit also."  
  
"I'll tell them. Look after yourself up there Pony and work hard." Soda said and then he hung up and I sighed and hung up my phone too. I glanced over at the desk and my books sitting where I'd left them before.  
  
"Right essay, this time you're going to be written like it or not." I said out loud, and then I sat in the chair and picked up my pen to write. 


	3. 

THREE:  
  
"Come on Pony, just chose a top already!" Mandy complained Friday night. I had pulled on one of the two shirts I owned (both presents from Mandy) but the collar was tight around my neck, and I pulled at it angrily.  
  
Mandy was sitting on my bed watching me get dressed. At first she was patient, but now that she'd been sitting there for nearly ten minutes she had that familiar "I've just about had all I can take" look on her face. She was dressed in a nice black dress with her hair bound up on her head.  
  
"Well I'm just not comfortable in shirts Mandy, you know that. This collars going to choke me." I complained. "Why couldn't we go somewhere where you don't have to wear slacks and shirts?"  
  
"Because," Mandy said slowly. "This is where everyone goes Pony. You can't be a greaser your whole life. You can't wear T-shirts and jeans your whole life!"  
  
I glared at her as I did my shirt up. I thought it was perfectly acceptable for me to go through life as a greaser. After all Soda and Darry were greasers and they did all right didn't they? And what the heck was wrong with T-shirts and jeans? "Don't see why not." I mumbled.  
  
"I meant you have to look presentable some times Pony," Mandy explained. "You're at college now, things are different here. That's why I bought you those shirts and slacks."  
  
"So I could go to swanky bars with snobby socs?" I asked before I could help myself.  
  
Mandy's face went pale. "I'm sorry if you don't like my choice in bars and friends Ponyboy. Maybe you'd be better off staying here tonight." She said stiffly.  
  
I sighed as I did the last button up and went over to sit next to her on the bed. "Mandy I didn't mean that." I assured her. "It's just I'm not used to things like this. I thought you liked me the way I am."  
  
"I DO!" Mandy assured me. "I've never tried to make you into anything else have I Pony? It's just your eighteen now, you're in college and soon you'll be out in the real world. It's a little different to life back home don't you think?"  
  
I thought about it. I could hardly see any of the gang wearing shirts and slacks and going to a bar. But then none of the gang were at college, none of them had the ambition I had in my life. And just because I got dressed up to go out once didn't mean I was any different; I was still a greaser! And could it possibly hurt me?  
  
"I'm sorry for making such a big deal out of it Mandy." I told her. "You're right of course- it's just clothes. But god if the gang could see me like this they'd die of laughter."  
  
"Let them." Mandy said haughtily. "And when you've got your degree and are a famous writer on a huge salary are you going to care who laughs at you?"  
  
I laughed. "They'll all be begging me for money." I said. "Especially Two- Bit. I was speaking to Soda and he said Two-Bit's parents are nagging him to death to get a job."  
  
Mandy stood up and grabbed her bag, while I stuffed my wallet and keys into my pocket. "You mean he still doesn't have one?" She asked rolling her eyes.  
  
"Yeah, well you know Two-Bit, I guess he's waiting for his dream job." I said with a shrug.  
  
"If we all waited for our dream job we'd all be on social security for years. Sometimes you have to settle for second best." Mandy said.  
  
  
  
I shrugged. Mandy had a point of course, but I sometimes got the impression she wasn't exactly slow to critisice the gang. I'm not saying she didn't get along with them because she did. In the few years we'd been a couple she'd spent a lot of time at my place so she got used to them and even had fun with them on occasions. But ever since we'd arrived at college she'd been even worse. I knew for her college was an opportunity to leave her old life behind and become the person she'd always wanted to be, but it wasn't the case for me. I had every intention of returning home when I'd finished and writing from my familiar old house. As far as I was concerned the past wasn't something I wanted to erase.  
  
"Pony? What are you waiting for?" Mandy demanded impatiently, and I hurried out of the room with her.  
  
"Anyway Soda was also saying Darry had a girlfriend." I continued.  
  
"About time." Mandy replied. "I always wondered why he didn't have a girlfriend. He's not exactly the hunchback of Notre Dame is he?"  
  
"But when I asked Soda about him getting a girlfriend he was quite adamant he didn't need one." I said with a sigh. "I thought that he was over Sandy, but clearly some wounds are a lot deeper than others."  
  
"He just needs time." Mandy advised. "And after all it's up to him. You can't run everyone's life Pony."  
  
"Huh?" I asked stopping and turning to her. "What do you mean?"  
  
"Nothing!" She said starting to walk, but I grabbed her hand and stopped her. "Mandy, is there something you want to say?"  
  
Mandy looked at me, and then raised her head defiantly. "Okay, there is!" She said calmly. "Pony I understand you love your family, and friends. And that's fine. But you're a college man now, not a kid. Sometimes I just wish you'd grow up a little that's all."  
  
"Grow up?" I repeated frowning.  
  
"Well look at the way you were carrying on about wearing nice clothes for a change Pony!" Mandy said. "You're not like an average greaser Pony- you're smarter and nicer.." She trailed off.  
  
I sighed, and ran a hand through my hair. What on earth was wrong with her? Since when had she ever complained about me being a greaser? I was about to ask her this when she sighed and spoke again. "Look Pony, if you want to be a greaser all your life then it's fine with me. I love you regardless."  
  
"It didn't sound like that." I said.  
  
"I wasn't saying I don't love you!" Mandy protested. "I met you and fell in love with you as a greaser for god's sake. I just think that you need to be a bit more mature about things sometimes."  
  
"Like clothes?" I asked incredulously.  
  
"Among things." She admitted.  
  
"We've never had a conversation like this in the last few years Mandy, why now?" I asked.  
  
"I don't know." She said looking away. "I guess it's just been bugging me a little since we arrived here. But look Pony, like I said I love you regardless, so don't worry about it all right? We're not going to fight over clothes are we?"  
  
"Of course not." I said with the best grin I could muster. "Let's get to this place. What time is Randy getting there?"  
  
"Eightish I think." Mandy said as we kept walking.  
  
As we walked we were silent. I was thinking about what Mandy had said; what had made her talk about it? Why had she suddenly decided that I shouldn't be a greaser anymore? What was so wrong with greasers? That was who I was, wasn't it?  
  
"Pony, you're thinking about it aren't you?" Mandy asked.  
  
"No." I lied.  
  
"Good because I didn't really mean it. I was just frustrated at you complaining about the clothes. I think you're mature enough, and great enough as you are!" She assured me.  
  
I smiled again, and took her hand as we walked. She wasn't fooling me- there was clearly something at the back of her mind to even begin a discussion like this! But for now, for tonight, I wasn't going to think about it- I was going to be mature and grown up and enjoy the bar! 


	4. 

FOUR:  
  
The bar was already packed when we arrived. True to Mandy's word everyone there was dressed neatly like me. A tall guy with dark blonde hair spotted Mandy and waved to her enthusiastically over the top of the crowd.  
  
"Who's that?" I asked her as she waved back.  
  
"His name's Brian, we sit together in history." Mandy explained. "Remember I told you I was working with a partner on an assignment?"  
  
"And that's your partner?" I asked as he made his way over to us.'  
  
"Yep." Mandy said, and then she greeted Brian with a hug.  
  
"You're late, I thought maybe you weren't coming." Brian said to her.  
  
"I told you we'd be here!" Mandy assured him. "We were just having some dramas with clothes."  
  
"Dramas with clothes?" Brian repeated.  
  
"Don't ask!" Mandy said rolling her eyes and laughing.  
  
I frowned. Was it my imagination or was my girlfriend making fun of me?  
  
"And this must be the famous Ponyboy." Brian said turning to me. The way he said my name he managed to convey disdain.  
  
"None other." Mandy said and then she turned to me. "Brian, Pony. Pony, Brian."  
  
Brian held out his hand and I had no choice but to take it and shake it.  
  
"I've heard a lot about you." Brian told me.  
  
"Interesting, since I've heard next to nothing about you." I replied, and I felt Mandy elbow me.  
  
"Pony, look there's Randy, why don't you go over and say hello? I'll be there in a moment." Mandy said.  
  
The last thing I wanted to do was to go over and say hello leaving Mandy there, but what could I say? I nodded, and went over.  
  
"Ponyboy Curtis!" Randy said, shaking my hand jovially. "How is college life treating you?"  
  
"Not bad." I said, glancing over at Mandy out of the corner of my eye. She and Brian were having an animated conversation about something, and she was shaking her head vigorously. "How about you?"  
  
"Yeah, a lot harder than I expected, but that's what you get for picking hard subjects." Randy said. "Mandy was telling me you're majoring in English and creative writing."  
  
I nodded. "That's the plan. Ever since I wrote a rather large essay for English a few years back I've always sort of thought I'd be a writer."  
  
"Well you're good at it you know. We all read your essay on England which was published in the school paper." Randy said.  
  
It had been something of an embarrassment to me when the teacher had decided my essay was so good he thought it should go into the paper so everyone could read it. I'd noticed people around the school reading the paper and then looking up as I walked past. Especially the Socs who mostly had disdainful expressions on their faces. I guessed to them a trip to England wasn't much special! In fact they probably had laughed at my innocent descriptions and wonder!  
  
"Yeah well, cool..." I muttered not sure what to say.  
  
"It's funny though, it was only after I read it that I saw some of the things in England in a different light. I mean to me Stonehenge was just a bunch of rocks, no big deal, but after I read your description of it, and the history I changed my mine. I guess I saw the significance in it perhaps. And that, Pony, is the sign of a good writer!" Randy told me.  
  
"What's the sign of a good writer?" Mandy asked, as she joined us.  
  
"Making people see things differently, making people change their mind." Randy explained to her.  
  
"Oh right." She agreed, and then she turned to me. "Brian thinks you don't like him."  
  
"I don't." I replied.  
  
Mandy looked taken aback. "Why not?" She asked. "You don't even know him, you barely even spoke to him!"  
  
"He seemed to slick." I replied.  
  
"Too slick?" Mandy managed, and then she realised Randy was still there, and shrugged. "Whatever." She said, but I knew the subject wasn't over- it would be brought up later. What a night it had been- Mandy and I were going to argue over two things. When before that we hardly ever even fought!  
  
"So how's the assignment going Mands?" Randy asked.  
  
"Yeah, it's coming along all right." Mandy replied. "We put in quite a bit of work on it the other night, in fact we got so absorbed in it we were working on it until almost three in the morning!"  
  
I raised my eyebrows. This was certainly news to me!  
  
"Well you better get a good mark after putting in that much effort!" Randy said with a grin. "An A for effort?"  
  
"Brian's so smart, I'm sure we'll do well. He knows everything, he makes me feel stupid sometimes he's that smart." Mandy admitted.  
  
By now I'd had more than enough of this talk about Brian, and my girlfriend's strange attitude. "I'm going to get a drink. Want one either of you?" I asked.  
  
"No thanks buddy." Randy said, and Mandy shook her head in response. I shrugged and went over to the bar.  
  
A few beers later the night was over. Mandy, her lips tight with anger, came over to take my arm. "I've told people you've got a headache and that's why you're not socializing."  
  
"Try telling them that they are not my type of people." I replied, not wanting to make her even angrier, but still knowing it had to be said. "Sorry Mandy, as much as I love you we just don't have the same taste in people, in friends."  
  
Mandy sighed. "It seems to me Pony, we don't have the same taste in anything anymore." She said, now sounding more sad than mad.  
  
"What do you mean?" I asked confused.  
  
"Nothing, let's get out of here." Mandy said.  
  
"You want to leave this early?" I asked surprised.  
  
"How can I stay when all I can see is my boyfriend standing by the bar drinking alone and looking completely miserable?" Mandy asked me. "Even Brian's noticed it."  
  
"Did he just?" I asked. "And what did he say?"  
  
"He asked where you all right? I said you weren't feeling too well." Mandy replied, and she pulled me up off the bar stool. "Besides I've seen you ordering at least three beers, and who knows how much more you've had? The last thing I need is you getting drunk and telling people what you really think."  
  
I tried to walk in a perfectly straight line to convince her I was not in the least drunk, but she didn't pay attention to my walking as we walked back towards campus. In fact she didn't say a word until we were nearly back and then she said "Pony, we've really got to talk."  
  
"If it's about my clothes and that stupid argument today-" I began, but she interrupted.  
  
"-That's part of it. But it's not it completely." She said. "There are a few things bothering me, and I've just got to get them off my chest."  
  
"Okay," I said with a sigh. "Shoot." 


	5. 

FIVE:  
  
We were standing out the front of my dorm and it was a warm night, but even so I was cold. I was sure I knew what was coming and I didn't want to hear it.  
  
"Pony, for me college is a new life. A chance to leave the old me behind, make amends for the old me, and be who I've always wanted to be." Mandy said, pushing a strand of her hair back behind her ear. Her earnest expression made me want to kiss her. Somehow I resisted, guessing that this wasn't the best time.  
  
"Mandy, isn't that the same as growing up?" I asked thoughtfully.  
  
"In a way perhaps." Mandy admitted. "The thing is I get the impression you don't want to grow up. That you're quite happy to go through life like you have been."  
  
I frowned. "What's wrong with the way I am? Correct me if I'm wrong but I thought you liked who I was!"  
  
Mandy sighed impatiently. "I DO Pony." She said. "I just can't seem to get my words right. You're the writer here not me."  
  
I smiled weakly. If she wanted to dump me why didn't she do it quickly and get it over with?  
  
"Okay," She said. "It's like this: I want to make new friends, do new things, and I want you to be there with me. But you're like an ostrich with its head stuck in the sand. College is about new experiences and Pony how can you say you hate my friends and the things I want to do if you've never even done them?"  
  
I nodded slowly. "I guess I can't." I admitted. "But has this stemmed from the fact that I hate wearing shirts?"  
  
She laughed. "Not really, that must made me decide to say something. Look Pony, if you come out with me and you really don't like my friends then that's fine. I won't expect you to hang out with them or anything, even though I'd love to have my boyfriend by my side. I just want you to at least give them the chance. Is that too much to ask?"  
  
I shook my head. In truth it was more than reasonable. "No, you're not asking too much at all." I assured her.  
  
Mandy let out a sigh of relief and smiled. "God I can't tell you how glad I am to have said that. I've been trying to work up the nerve to discuss it with you the last few days- that's probably why I've been snappy with you- but I was worried you'd be angry at me and think I wanted to change you."  
  
"And you don't?" I asked, just to make sure.  
  
"NO!" Mandy said, and she stepped over to take my face in her hands and kiss me gently on the lips. "Ponyboy Curtis I thank god for the day he let me meet you. If you only knew the half of what you've done for me."  
  
"So you're not dumping me then?" I asked.  
  
"Pony!" She shook her head. "Don't be ridiculous. Why would I dump you? Because you don't like to wear shirts?"  
  
"Can I just ask you one more little thing?" I asked.  
  
She sighed. "Sure, shoot."  
  
"Well when I was talking about the gang, and this has happened a bit lately, you seem to..well it's like you don't like them." I explained.  
  
"I like them fine." She said. "I guess sometimes I just think they're holding you back and the idea of you not reaching your full potential because of them kind of bugs me."  
  
"Oh." I thought about that for a moment, and then decided I was not in the mood for deep thoughts. There was something else I was in the mood for. I grabbed Mandy's hand and we went into the dorm and up to my room.  
  
*****  
  
"Rise and shine children!" Eric said, and he pulled the curtains wide open.  
  
I groaned and sat up. "Glory, what the heck was that for?" I demanded. "Isn't that nice expensive watch your folks gave you for getting into college working? Because if it was you'd know it's only seven in the morning!" Beside me Mandy stirred and opened her eyes, then closed them at the light.  
  
"I'm aware of the time. It's just such a beautiful day and we're in it." Eric replied, sitting on the edge of his bed.  
  
I'd heard those words somewhere before, but I wasn't sure where. "Well that's great and all Eric, but do you think you could let me get some more sleep? I'm not used to cheerfulness this early in the morning."  
  
Eric frowned. "You actually don't know what day it is, do you?" He asked.  
  
"Saturday. The third Saturday I've been here, so that makes it the-" I began, but he interrupted.  
  
"-Today is the day we find out whether or not we get into the fraternities we pledged." Eric said, patiently.  
  
"Only thing is I actually didn't pledge any." I replied.  
  
"You what?" Eric repeated shocked. "Pony, fraternities are the most important part of college. It's like having another family. A home away from home."  
  
"I came to college to study." I said with a sigh.  
  
Mandy sat up. "You know Pony," She said. "A frat would have been a great experience for you. A great NEW experience."  
  
"Yeah, guess so. Pity it's too late." I said. "Can you chuck me my smokes Eric?"  
  
Eric obliged and I gratefully lit one up.  
  
"You know Pony, if I get into the Betta's I could probably try and pull a few strings.." Eric offered.  
  
I took a big drag on my cigarette and was about to say no thanks when I remembered the conversation with Mandy the night before. So my girlfriend thought I wasn't open to new experiences did she? And she said all she wanted was for me to give things a chance right? "Sure, if you could that would be great!" I said.  
  
Mandy looked shocked and then grinned. "That's the way Pony!" She said.  
  
Eric looked surprised too, but he also looked pleased. "Well I better get going and see the list. Besides I'm sure you want to get up and dressed and being the innocent I am I've never seen a woman in anything other than full clothing."  
  
I rolled my eyes, but Mandy threw the pillow at him. "I bet!" She said. "In fact, I think you might have been one of my roomies conquests!"  
  
Eric raised an eyebrow. "Unfortunately I haven't been anyone's conquest- so what room are you in anyway?"  
  
"Eric!" I said and he laughed and left the room. I pulled on my jeans and top and Mandy got dressed as well.  
  
"Would you really join a frat Pony?" She asked me.  
  
"I don't see why not. It could be kind of interesting actually. Kind of like home- hanging out with the gang and all." I said.  
  
"Somehow I don't think they're very likely to be the same thing.." Mandy said but she didn't persue the thought. "Anyway let's go grab a coffee and something for breakfast before I have to meet Brian."  
  
"Meet Brian?" I repeated.  
  
"To work on our project." Mandy replied as we left the room.  
  
"On a Saturday?" I asked.  
  
"Yes on a Saturday." Mandy said. "It's a pretty important one Pony. And listen, I was thinking yesterday and I forgot to tell you with our stupid little argument and all- I've decided to try out for the cheerleading squad after all. Tryouts are tomorrow."  
  
"You have? That's great!" I said enthusiastically. "You'll be a shoo-in Mandy, I promise you."  
  
"I don't know about that." She said, but she was obviously pleased.  
  
"I guess that means I'm going to have to go to the football games then to watch you cheering." I said as we walked down the steps of the dorm.  
  
"You mean to watch me in my short skirt?" Mandy repeated, tucking her arm through mine.  
  
"Well yes, that would be a definite plus. Of course I hadn't thought of that.." I agreed and she laughed.  
  
"I'm sure it was the last thing on your mind." She assured me.  
  
As we walked across the campus like that I was actually glad that Mandy had come out with it all the night before and told me what it was that was bugging her. If she hadn't things would have continued in the same vein with us having stupid little arguments over nothing. And I was also glad that it was all simply about me trying some new things, and not being stuck in my ways rather than something a lot more serious which could possibly threaten our relationship!  
  
  
  
[A/N. I know you all thought Mandy was going to dump Pony, and I think perhaps that was on my mind too, but then I decided that was not going to happen. Of course there could still be an underlying reason as to why Mandy wants Pony to be more open to things and to her friends and interests...Or not.....] 


	6. 

SIX:  
  
Despite the fact that it was actually Darry's news it was Soda who rang me with it later that day. After Mandy and I'd had breakfast and she'd gone to meet Brian to work on their assignment I'd decided to go to the library and put in some work on an assignment of my own. I managed to finish the essay I'd been struggling with and it was ready to be handed in on Monday. I was so impressed that I'd managed to get it done that I treated myself to some nachos for lunch and took them back to my dorm room to eat. I'd only just gotten back when the phone rang.  
  
"Hey Pony, not interrupting anything am I?" Soda asked.  
  
"If you count eating nachos and reading a book something." I replied with a laugh.  
  
Soda snorted. "And here I was thinking college was for doing wild things like partying and drinking!" He said. "I must have been way off track."  
  
"You forgot the studying." I reminded him.  
  
"Yeah, how's it all going? Hard is it?" Soda asked.  
  
"It can be, but it's not too bad yet. Give me a call in a few months when I'm really in the middle of things and I might be able to tell you differently." I replied. "So, what's with the phone call? Second one in a few days!" When I'd left for college Soda and Darry had told me they would only call me occasionally since they didn't want me to feel like some kind of baby whose older brothers were constantly checking up on him!  
  
"Well it's actually about Darry." Soda explained.  
  
I felt my heart skip a beat. I can't help that, after all the things I've been through in my life when I hear that there is news I automatically think it's bad news. This despite the fact that Soda was obviously in a good mood and therefore nothing too serious could have happened to Darry. But I didn't think logically. I never do when I'm afraid. "Is he all right?" I asked anxiously.  
  
"Yeah he's fine." Soda replied and he was silent for a moment. I had the feeling he was struggling with something; like how to ask me why I always thought the worst? As if seeing Johnny kill the soc Bob when he and his friends jumped me wasn't enough, then there was the whole episode where we had to run away, and where Johnny had saved the lives of children ending his in the process. And follow that by seeing Dally die, and having Soda's heart broken again by Sandy. No bloody wonder I always thought the worst.  
  
Apparently Soda thought better of this, and instead he went on with the news he'd rang me to give. "Darry's getting married Ponyboy." He said.  
  
I nearly choked on my nacho. "Married? Darry?" I repeated.  
  
"Yeah, I think perhaps young Jessica-that's her name- is in the family way and Darry is doing what he thinks is the right thing." Soda replied.  
  
I noticed the way he said that; Darry doing what he THINKS is the right thing is what Soda said. "And what about you? What do you think?" I asked.  
  
"I don't know." Soda said, but I knew he was lying. "I guess what's right for some people isn't always right for others. And Jessica seems a very nice person, and they're a few years older than we were..."  
  
"Are they going to live there? In our house?" I asked.  
  
"Yeah, I guess perhaps I'd better start looking for somewhere new to live." Soda said thoughtfully.  
  
"Why would you?" I demanded angrily. "Sodapop you've got as much right as Darry to stay there and more right than this Jessica girl for gods sake!"  
  
"I know, I mean they've never said anything like that, but I'd just feel like I was in the way y'know?" Soda said.  
  
"Have you spoken to Darry about it?" I asked. Personally I wouldn't have been able to speak to Darry about something like that, even though we sure as heck got on a lot better in the last few years. But Soda and Darry had always been closer.  
  
"I'm not really sure how to." Soda admitted. "Anyway I better get off the phone before this call costs me a fortune and Darry goes through the roof when he gets the phone bill."  
  
"Okay, well tell Darry congrats for me. And say hey to Two-Bit for me." I replied, purposely leaving out Steve. To be honest he was the only one I didn't miss.  
  
"Sure thing, and Pony?" Soda asked.  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"I miss you y'know." Soda said, sounding as though it wasn't exactly something he wanted to admit. "I sometimes wish you were here to talk to now Darry's got other things on his mind and all..."  
  
What could I say to that? "Yeah, well I miss you too Soda, and the gang." I replied.  
  
"See ya buddy." Soda said.  
  
After I hung up the phone I sat down with my book and nachos, but the book remained unopened on my lap. How would Soda cope with Darry getting married and further would he have to move out of the house? It seemed a little unfair to me, even though it was only natural that Darry and his new wife would want some privacy. But there was one thing I knew for sure: I was glad I was here at college rather than back there. Darry getting married and having a kid could only bring back bad memories for Soda, and as much as I should have wished I was there to comfort him, I selfishly was glad I was at college where I didn't have to put up with it all. I decided after I finished my nachos I'd go and let Mandy know the news. However Eric arrived back then, and all thoughts of Darry's marriage went out of my head as Eric announced proudly "It so happens that the president of the frat happens to be an old friend of mine. We used to muck round together back home in Beverly Hills. And therefore he's quite willing to let you join as a favor to me. It seems he hasn't forgotten the favor I did for him the other year when he was on his college break!" 


	7. 

SEVEN:  
  
"Ponyboy Curtis the frat boy? Who would ever have thought?" a voice behind me said, and I turned around to see Randy grinning at me. I was standing in the lounge room of the fairly luxurious frat house, wondering whether I could fit in with the people who were wandering around. They were all like Eric- rich kids who'd always gotten their own way, and probably always would. Most of them were probably only at college to please their parents. In fact, they were probably just like the socs back home, except they were the Californian versions! Eric had introduced me to the president, Daniel, who had looked at me for a moment, and then back at Eric, before welcoming me. "Eric speaks very highly of you Pony." And then the two had wandered off in discussion leaving me standing in the lounge room looking, and feeling, like a moron. So in all honesty I was actually pretty grateful for Randy's coming over to speak to me.  
  
"Oh, hi." I said, a little uncomfortably. Even though after Bob's death I got to know Randy a lot better I never felt completely natural around him, as though I couldn't really be myself. I wondered what the gang would say if they knew we were not really friends, but spoke to each other on occasions. Unlike myself they never spoke to socs, other than to insult them that is. And while I didn't really speak to any, Randy and I'd always had some kind of silent understanding after Bob's death, and I knew that he was actually a pretty good guy. "Are you in this frat too?"  
  
Randy nodded. "My Father was in it, and my cousin was President a few years back. It's something of a family tradition. I didn't see you at any of the pledge events though."  
  
"I didn't exactly pledge." I admitted. And then I told him about how the president owed Eric a favor, which I had no idea of, and he'd agreed to let me join.  
  
Randy looked surprised. "It must be a pretty big favor. I've never heard of anything like that happening before."  
  
"I have no idea, I don't even really know what I'm doing here to be honest." I admitted. "I think I sort of wanted to prove something to Mandy."  
  
"What does she think?" Randy asked.  
  
I shrugged. "I haven't seen her since this morning. She's studying, and probably practicing for cheerleader tryouts tomorrow, and Eric and I came over here pretty much straight away." I explained. "But you can bet she'll be pleased."  
  
Randy laughed. "She probably likes the idea of dating a frat boy."  
  
I sighed and wished I could smoke in the house. What kind of home was it going to be if I couldn't even do the things I was used to doing at home? "Perhaps, perhaps not." I said. "To tell you the truth she's been acting kind of strange lately. She flares up about the least little thing and she tells me it's because she wants me to grow up and experience things in college...I don't know though." Immediately after I'd spoken I was shocked. Was I confiding in Randy the soc?  
  
Randy looked thoughtful. "Pony, I shouldn't say anything, but there's some things about Mandy you don't know..and judging by what you just said you probably should know.." He said. "Look come outside with me. I'm dying for a cigarette."  
  
I followed him outside curiously, and we both lit up our cigarettes. Randy didn't speak until he'd had two big drags. "Has Mandy ever told you that the two of us go way back?" He asked.  
  
I stared at him. This was news to me. As far as I'd known Mandy had lived in New York all her life until she moved to our town a few years back. And as far as I'd known Randy had lived in our town all his life.  
  
"We used to go to summer camp together every year. All our parents used to pack us off there from when we were about ten until we were fifteen or sixteen. In all honesty it was actually a pretty nice place, set on a lake where we had tones of activities to chose from, and we even had a five-star chef! It was a holiday for us and our parents!" Randy said, leaning against the stone railings on the steps. "Anyway, Mandy and I got to know each other well- we always got on well. Don't look at me like that Pony, we were nothing more than friends, and we never will be! Mandy, as you no doubt know, is the sort of girl everyone wants to be friends with- both guys and girls. When she was fifteen Mandy developed a crush on one of the instructors there, the boating instructor if my memory serves me correctly. She wasn't the only one to have a crush on him, but she was the only one who he actually paid any attention to. They'd flirt together and Mandy was having the time of her life. One night he convinced her to sneak out and go for a midnight swim with him. But it turned out swimming wasn't exactly what he had in mind. He raped her Pony. Mandy was devastated of course, and she went home straight away. Her parents thought she was making it up to get home and they actually grounded her! So the bastard got away with it, and for all we know he could have tried it again since. This was about a year before Mandy moved to our town by the way. So when Mandy keeps talking about making a new life, trying new things, Pony she's not trying to change you- she's trying to change her. I don't think she ever completely got over it, but a few months after you two started going out she confided in me and told me that being with you was helping her get over her demons. All might have been fine and perhaps she wouldn't have been so adamant about becoming the new Mandy if she hadn't seen the bastard on the first day here. He's a student here, and I think it brought it all back for her. She only mentioned it to me, and when I wanted to talk about it, she refused and said she was fine. But if you're having problems because of her new attitude, well it's not because of you, or really even because of her. It's because of what happened in the past..."  
  
I was shocked. I opened my mouth to speak but no words could come out. In part I was a little relieved that Mandy's "new experiences, new life" attitude wasn't anything to do with me, but the majority of me was shocked and saddened. How could someone have hurt her so badly? And how come she'd never told me? And lastly a tiny part of me was angry- not at Mandy, but at the bastard who'd done this.  
  
"Mandy's going to kill me of course." Randy said, flicking his cigarette away. "But I know how much she loves you Pony, and you seem to love her as much. Losing you would kill her, and perhaps if you didn't know the real reason behind her recent attitude change she might have lost you."  
  
I was touched. Randy must really care about Mandy to do this. And the fact that it was me, the guy who was involved in his best friend's death a few years back, made it even more obvious. "Randy, thanks. I would never have expected you to do something like this with me being involved in it, but thanks.."  
  
Randy knew what I was talking about, and his face went slightly red. "I've told you before Pony, I know Bob was no saint. He really did deserve what he got. Johnny was only trying to save your life."  
  
"Yeah...well..." I muttered equally embarrassed. I have enough trouble talking about this with the gang, let alone a soc! Luckily I was saved by Eric calling me from the doorway, relieving the tension.  
  
"YO! Pony! I've bagged us the best room in the place. Another little favor." He winked. "Come and see it." And he disappeared back into the house.  
  
Beside me Randy frowned. "What did he do I wonder?" He asked me in a low voice.  
  
I shrugged. "I really don't know, but the chances are I'll know soon enough. Eric's not exactly the quiet type."  
  
Randy laughed. "I noticed." He said.  
  
"Well I better go look at this room, and then I'm going over to see Mandy. And don't worry Randy, she won't hate you for this. More likely she's going to be glad it's no longer a deep, dark secret. Sharing it will make her feel better." I promised as I started up the steps.  
  
"I know it'll make her feel better." Randy called after me. "But she'll probably kill me first before she realises that!"  
  
I laughed and went inside. 


	8. 

EIGHT:  
  
"PONY!" Mandy said in shock as she answered the door. "I wasn't expecting you this afternoon. I thought you knew I was spending the day studying?"  
  
"I knew, but there were a few things I had to tell you." I replied.  
  
She sighed and moved out of the way. Since the bed was covered in books and papers I went and sat at the desk, sitting backwards on the chair with my elbows resting on the top. She looked at me and then sat down on the bed herself. "Well then Pony, what's the big news you couldn't wait to tell me?" She asked resigned to the fact that her study was on hold for a bit!  
  
"Firstly Eric pulled a few strings and I've been invited to join the frat. I went over with him to take a look at the place this afternoon. To tell you the truth it's not exactly the sort of place I could see myself living in. It's about a million times more luxurious and swanky than my place back home. It might be kind of strange living in some place like that during the year, and then going home to my place.." I said.  
  
Mandy shook her head. "Pony, if they want you in the frat accept it. Don't go being some kind of reverse snob." She told me. "And besides, I happen to think you're good enough to be at home in any kind of housing!"  
  
"Thanks," I said giving her a smile. "Anyway I'll have to make up my mind in the next few days. Eric bagged us a pretty good room!"  
  
"So you'll still be sharing with him?" Mandy asked.  
  
"Yeah, but that's cool with me." I replied. "I wouldn't want to share with anyone else now I've gotten used to him and all. He's not that bad."  
  
"No, he doesn't seem too bad." Mandy agreed. "Now was there any other piece of earth shattering news you had to share with me right this second?" I knew she was teasing me, and didn't really mind my company.  
  
"Well Darry's getting married." I offered casually.  
  
Mandy looked shocked. "You're kidding? I'd never have thought, I mean I was surprised enough to hear he had a girlfriend, but marriage. Wow!"  
  
"I think Soda's feeling a bit strange over it, after his disaster with Sandy and all, but he'll be right. He's stronger than we sometimes think." I said.  
  
Mandy nodded. "You're right there. I get the impression he's one of the strongest of the gang."  
  
"And Randy's in the same frat as me." I said watching her face and wondering how to go about telling her what I knew?  
  
"Is he?" Mandy replied. "Well that's good, he's really not a bad guy Pony."  
  
"I know." I said. "Today we actually had a pretty in depth chat...Look Mandy, I don't know how to say this, so I'm just going to come out and say it. I know why you've been so strange since we got here- it was because of what happened to you at summer camp wasn't it?"  
  
I then had the experience of seeing my girlfriend like I'd never seen her before. She seemed to crumple on the bed, and tears flowed down her cheeks. "He shouldn't have told you Pony." She said.  
  
I hurried over to sit next to her and put my arm around her, pulling her face onto my shoulder. "And if he hadn't would you? More likely you'd have simply kept it to yourself, all this emotion bottling up inside you." I told her gently. "I'm glad he told me Mandy!"  
  
"I guess," she sat up and rubbed at her eyes. "I am too. I did want to tell you Pony, so you'd understand the way I was behaving and not think it was all you or something terrible like that, but it's kind of hard to say something like that."  
  
"Even to me?" I asked. "Even to your boyfriend of a few years?"  
  
"To anyone Pony." Mandy admitted. "When I told my parents would you believe they thought I was making it up to get home from camp early? Simply because that year I hadn't wanted to go. They actually said making such serious allegations against someone purely for vengeance was very wrong, and they grounded me for the rest of the summer. Mom said to me "Now you'll wish you hadn't made up this lie to get home early when you can't even go anywhere won't you?" Having my own parents think I was lying after going through something so traumatic almost killed me Pony. In fact that summer, lying in my room grounded, I contemplated suicide on a few occasions. We moved to our town about eight months later, and I was actually shocked to see Randy there. It brought back memories I didn't want since I'd managed to mostly put them behind me in those eight months. And then I thought I'd done that again, but seeing him, seeing Daniel, made me sick Pony. I wondered how many other people he's hurt like me?"  
  
"Daniel?" I repeated. "Where do I know that name?"  
  
Mandy looked as though she was going to say something, but then she shook her head. "I don't know Pony." She said. "Anyway, I'm not going to let him ruin my life completely. And I'm sure as hell not going to let him ruin my relationship..that is, if I haven't already ruined it myself?" Now she looked at me through her wet eyes, pleading.  
  
"Mandy." I said, pulling her back to me and hugging her tightly. "You haven't. I love you more than anyone I've ever known, and I'm not going to let you go just because of this!"  
  
"You know Pony," She said, her voice muffled against my chest. "You've been so good for me. You taught me to be myself again, be outgoing, be happy. And you taught me that love can exist, and not all men are complete bastards! I should be thanking you."  
  
I laughed. "Well you can't thank me, since I should be thanking you as well." I told her. "After all, who else would put up with this greaser?"  
  
"Well it's their loss if they don't!" Mandy assured me. "And of course, my gain. And might I add they better keep their hands off you whoever they are, if they want to live."  
  
I smiled and then asked, "So, are you definitely trying out for the cheerleading squad tomorrow? I'm assuming that seeing Daniel made you hesitant about it?"  
  
"You're right- as usual." Mandy said. "I couldn't stand the thought of him seeing me, or even bragging to his friends about me.." She shuddered. "But then I thought about it and decided that would be letting him win, letting him get the better of me, and that's just not going to happen! Besides, I love cheerleading, and being on the college squad would be a dream come true. Have you seen some of the moves they do? They're complicated and take a lot of skill, but I think I can do them. And it would be very rewarding if I could!"  
  
"I've told you- you're a shoo in." I promised her. "Now I know you want to study and all but I think in all honesty the thing you need most in the world at the moment is a nice ice-cream sundae. My treat."  
  
Mandy grinned. "How could I say no to that?" She asked. "Just let me fix my hair and face."  
  
A few minutes later we left the dorm hand in hand, with me being so glad that I'd found out the problems plaguing my poor girlfriend, and been able to talk to her about them. No doubt she was relieved about it too! Maybe now we could start getting into college life and having fun? 


	9. 

NINE:  
  
The next afternoon I sat in the bleachers watching as all around me girls warmed up for the cheerleading tryouts. I had to admit that Mandy had a bit of competition, although I didn't think it would be any problem for her. But then I am pretty biased. The day before, after we'd had our conversation about what had happened to Mandy, had been one of the happiest days in a long time. With all her problems off her chest Mandy was back to the girl I fell in love with.  
  
"Here for a perv too hey buddy?" A guy asked me as he climbed the stairs and came to sit near me.  
  
I laughed. "Actually I'm here to support my girlfriend." I explained.  
  
"Yeah, which one's your girlfriend?" He asked.  
  
I pointed her out where she was stretching a few yards away from the nearest group. "That's her, my Mandy." I said. I cherished saying that; 'my Mandy' now that I knew she hadn't been so much annoyed at me during all our stupid little arguments but more at herself and her past.  
  
The guy looked at me peculiarly. "Right." He said slowly, and then he changed the subject. "Well I don't have a girlfriend and I'm here for the perv solely."  
  
I nodded, not really sure what there was to say to that. 'Good luck' perhaps? But before I could think of something to say Randy waved to me as he bounded up the stairs to where we were sitting. He looked at the guy next to me. "Matthew." He said.  
  
"Randy." The guy replied, his tone cold. "How have you been?"  
  
"Fine. You?" Randy asked, although his tone was just as cold and I had the impression that he didn't really care how Matthew was at all.  
  
"Yeah fine too." Matthew said. "I better get going. I'll see you round."  
  
"Right, bye." Randy said and he watched, his eyes narrowed, as Matthew left the stadium.  
  
"What was going on there?" I asked curious. The air surrounding us had gone as cold as ice.  
  
"Nothing buddy, don't worry." Randy said but I could tell he was lying. "Haven't they started yet?"  
  
I shook my head. "I think they're running a bit late. So why are you here?"  
  
"Oh you know, thought I might give Mandy some more support." Randy replied nonchalantly.  
  
I shook my head. "Sure, and the real reason now Randy?"  
  
He laughed. "I can't fool you can I Pony?" He asked. "See the red head over near the left side? Her name is Candy and she's my 'Law and Society' class and she's a babe."  
  
I nodded. "Yeah, she's not bad." I agreed.  
  
"I'm trying to get up the nerve to ask her out." Randy confessed.  
  
I looked surprised. Normally Randy was pretty confident and wouldn't have had a problem with asking a girl out. So I asked him why he was hesitant this time?  
  
"Her ex. He's on the football team and he's huge. I've heard rumors he still likes her and hasn't gotten over the fact that she dumped him." Randy explained.  
  
"Ah right." I said. "Well if they've broken up she's fair game in my opinion."  
  
"She might not even want to go out with me." Randy said. "That would save a lot of problems."  
  
I rolled my eyes. "Perhaps, but then you wouldn't get to be with her and you like her, so it's not really solving any of your problems is it?"  
  
"No, guess not." Randy replied, however our conversation was cut short as the tryouts began. For the next hour or so they all went through their paces. Without being prejudiced I thought Mandy was one of the best there. Afterwards I made my way down to her.  
  
"Mandy, you were great. A shoo-in." I said giving her a quick hug, despite the fact that she was pretty sweaty.  
  
"I think I stuffed up a bit on my back crunch- I didn't get quite enough height. And my triple herky-" Mandy began, but I interrupted her.  
  
"Mandy from where I was sitting you looked great. Stop worrying." I told her.  
  
She grinned. "Thanks, but you're not exactly an expert on cheerleading are you Pony?" She asked.  
  
"I'm an expert on what looks good though..and let me tell you, you looked good!" I said in a slightly lower voice as Randy made his way over towards us.  
  
"Pony!" She said, but she smiled.  
  
"Good audition Mandy. Excuse me but I've got to see someone." Randy said and he hurried away before Mandy even had the chance to reply.  
  
"What was all that about?" Mandy asked raising her eyebrows.  
  
I told her and she smiled. "I vaguely know Candy and she's nice enough. I hope she says yes. Randy needs someone." She said. "Now, I'm going to have a shower. I must stink to the high heavens."  
  
"Well I wasn't going to be so tactless as to say it.." I said, and she hit me.  
  
"But I sure could do with a nice big drink. Do you want to go to the juice bar afterwards?" She asked, as we began to walk off the field.  
  
"Juice bar?" I asked making a face.  
  
"Okay," Mandy said. "We could go to the café instead. I can get a juice there and you can get your usual coke."  
  
I frowned to myself. Even though I knew now that Mandy hadn't been annoyed at me as much as I'd thought I still had agreed to try new things hadn't I? "Okay," I said with a sigh. "The juice bar it is. I suppose I could get something relatively normal there like an orange juice whilst you try those exotic combinations they advertise on the board.."  
  
Mandy put her arm around me as we walked. "Thanks Pony." She said. "You've been great the last day or so since you found out about what happened to me the other year. If I'd known how good you would be I'd have told you sooner- much sooner."  
  
I didn't point out the fact that she hadn't actually told me, but instead I just smiled too as we walked back towards her dorm. 


	10. 

Ten:  
  
A few days later I Eric and I moved into the frat house, although I was still a little bit apprehensive. I didn't think I was the type to fit into the place, but Eric told me I didn't have to be like everyone else to fit in. "Pony it's not always about money," He explained. "People can be the same when one has money and the other doesn't." I looked at him strangely when he said that- sometimes Eric really surprised me with the things he came out with. I shrugged and continued with my unpacking. Eric left in order to go and check whether we had any mail, and to make sure that any mail we'd get in the future would be sent here instead of the dorms. I hadn't had any mail in the few weeks I'd been there, but it didn't surprise me- somehow I couldn't see any of the gang writing me a letter.  
  
There was a knock on the door and Randy poked his head in. "Hey Pony, just thought I'd let you know I've got a date with the very gorgeous Candy tonight." He told me with a grin. I knew he'd been planning on asking her out after the cheerleading tryouts the other day, but hadn't seen him since to hear how it went.  
  
"Good luck buddy." I replied, and he gave me the thumbs up and left the room. I was almost done with my unpacking when I came across something I hadn't even realised that I'd brought to college with me: it was a photo from a few years before. In the photo Johnny was staring into the camera, trying his best to look tough, although the expression just didn't suit him. I thought about how sometimes we think people are tough, but they're not always, how they sometimes are vulnerable no matter how much they try to hide it. Take Dally for example. We always thought he was tough, and he was in the fact that he was a typical hood, but Johnny's death had affected him like nobody could have imagined. Even Dally Winston was human. I didn't realise how long I'd been sitting there looking at the photo and thinking until Eric came bounding back into the room to throw an envelope at me. I hastily put the photo away, and took the envelope a little surprised. After all who would write to me? I turned it over and saw Darryl Curtis written on the back. It was from Darry! I opened it quickly, and to my surprise two return airline tickets fell out. I looked at them for a moment before turning back to the letter. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Eric screw up his letter and throw it at the bin muttering something under his breath before storming out of the room. The letter was not exactly long, but then Darry wouldn't have the time to sit down and write a long letter.  
  
'Dear Pony,  
  
I guess you noticed the two tickets enclosed by the time you read this. They're for you and Mandy to come for my wedding. I know the timing's probably not the best for you and all, but I'd really like my little brother to be there. As you may, or may not know, we're kind of rushing the whole wedding thing because my fiancée is pregnant and we want to be married by the time the baby comes. As you can tell by the dates on the tickets the wedding will take place next weekend. Again sorry about the short notice. Another thing Pony, I was hoping that you would be my best man along with Soda. I know it's not exactly traditional to have two best men, but I wanted both my brothers to be standing up there with me. The wedding isn't going to be huge, but my fiancée has a fairly large family, so they'll make the numbers up a bit. Anyway, I better close because I've got a few things to do, including posting this. I hope to see you next weekend as well as Mandy.  
  
Darry.'  
  
I shook my head in surprise and checked the dates on the tickets- sure enough they were for next Friday afternoon, and returning on the Sunday afternoon. I decided I had better go and tell Mandy the news, but as I started out the room the letter Eric had thrown towards the bin caught my eye. I picked it up to put it in the bin when the words "a disgrace to the entire family" caught my eye, and despite myself I began to read it. The letter was from Eric's Mom and it dealt with the fact that he was joining the fraternity. Normally, she explained, the fact that he was joining the very frat his father had been in would be a source of some pride to both her and his father. However whilst shopping on Rodeo Drive the other day she'd run into someone who told her that the President of the frat was none other than "that no good ex-friend of yours". She demanded to know had Eric forgotten his promise to them? "I know you think what you did for him was the right thing, and maybe it was for him, but you are perfectly aware of the repercussions it had on our families reputation" She wrote, the pen practically digging into the paper. "and therefore I expect nothing less than for you to leave the fraternity at once. If anyone here got wind of the fact that the two of you were associating again, albeit in a limited capacity, tongues would start wagging." She went on to explain that even though some of the rumours about him had never been completely proven both she and his father thought that by some of his other actions they were entirely possible and the sooner he was away from the fraternity the better. She ended with the fact that once there was a new President they would be quite happy for him to rejoin the fraternity.  
  
"Do you often read other people's mail?" Eric's voice enquired from the door, and I felt my face begin to burn.  
  
"I wasn't exactly reading it-" I began, but Eric snorted. He came over to rip the letter from my hands and stuff it in his pocket.  
  
"Funny Pony, because it certainly looked to me like you were reading it." He said.  
  
"It was on the floor, so I picked it up to put it back in the bin, and sorry Eric, I didn't mean to read it, it just sort of happened." I said, not really sure how to explain to him that it had not been an intentional act.  
  
Eric sighed and ran his hand through his hair. "I guess you're wondering what's going on then aren't you? You know I did him a favour which was the catalyst for him letting you join the frat right, but now you're probably wondering why my parents are so vehemently opposed to any association between the two of us?" He asked.  
  
I shrugged, even though I was curious.  
  
"My parents have different opinions on most things to me in case you hadn't already noticed. They take the fact that they're one of the more important members of society back home very, very seriously. When I was younger I was a bit of a rebel, as most teenagers are, but I was more rebelling against the fact that I was who I was than anything. My entire life was laid out for me the day I was born Pony, do you have any idea what that's like?" I shook my head. "Well it's rotten. It makes you think you're nothing, not even an individual person. I started hanging around with the wrong crowd, and when our esteemed President here was accused of doing something that I actually did rather than let him take the blame, which would have been so easy, I stood up and admitted that it was me. My parents were horrified of course, claiming I was lying because I was under pressure or some other crap, but I stuck to my story, not giving a damn whether it made people talk about them or not. They made me promise that I wouldn't ever speak to "that person" again, and I promised. But for heavens sake that was three years ago now and you'd think they had gotten over it. I'm not leaving the frat for something so stupid no matter what they say." Eric finished and then he looked at me waiting for me to speak.  
  
"What were the other things he was accused of?" I asked Eric, but he shook his head.  
  
"Just stupid lies made up by stupid people. I'm not saying he's perfect-not that anyone ever is- but they were spiteful allegations and it's not worth even speaking about them." Eric replied. And then he changed the subject. "So a bunch of us are going to go and play a game of ball? I came back to see whether you wanted to come as well. It'd be a good chance for you to get to know some of your new frat brothers."  
  
"Sorry, but I've got to go over and see Mandy." I replied.  
  
Eric rolled his eyes. "You've GOT to go see her have you?" He asked sarcastically.  
  
I held up the airline tickets. "Darry's getting married next weekend and he sent these for Mandy and I, so I thought I'd better let her know since it's only nine days away."  
  
"Okay, well another time then?" Eric asked, and he started out of the room, but stopped when I called to him.  
  
"Eric, I just want you to know that I didn't intentionally read that letter. I'd never invade your privacy like that. The words just caught my eyes as I picked it up to put in the bin." I told him.  
  
He looked at me for a moment and then nodded. "I know you'd never do anything like that on purpose Pony, don't worry about it buddy." And then he went to play ball, and I went over to see Mandy to tell her about our trip for the wedding. 


	11. 

Eleven:  
  
I sighed as I leant against the airplane window watching LA disappear below me as we took off. It wasn't too long a trip but I still had some of my homework to do on the way, although I knew it was more than likely my books would remain in my backpack untouched for the journey. Darry assured me that there would be someone waiting at the airport when I arrived. I thought back to last week when I told Mandy about the tickets arriving, and Darry's impending wedding.  
  
*****  
  
To my surprise Mandy hadn't been completely enthusiastic about a trip back home, even for Darry's wedding. "It's really bad timing Pony." She told me frowning, leaning back in her desk chair where she'd been working when I came in. "We're just about finished with our assignment for Sociology, but we've got to present it so we're working on that."  
  
"Yeah, but Mandy, Darry's expecting us." I argued.  
  
"I'm sure Darry would understand that we've got other commitments." Mandy said, a touch patronizingly. "After all- we ARE in college Pony."  
  
I frowned and sat down on her bed eyeing her thoughtfully. "You don't want to go, do you? It's not that you can't, you just don't want to."  
  
Mandy sighed and got off the chair to come over to sit next to me on the bed. "Maybe you're right Pony." She admitted.  
  
"But it's just for a wedding." I protested.  
  
Mandy sighed. "I know that Pony, I just don't really want to go back. Okay so I have got a lot of work to do here, but the truth is I don't want to go back at the moment. I'd have to see my parents and that would just drag up memories I don't need right now. Not when I'm coping so well."  
  
I sighed too. "Fine, I guess I'm going alone then." I couldn't help but be a little annoyed at her. I thought she would have wanted to go for Darry's wedding, considering she really admired my older brother for all he had done for Soda and I. They'd always got on well, in fact both often sung the other's praises to me! I had thought, considering how well our relationship had been going lately, that she'd be more than happy to go to the wedding and be part of the family.  
  
"I guess you are." Mandy replied. "But say hello to everyone for me and tell them I'm sorry I had too much work to do to make it. Give Darry a big congratulationary hug for me!"  
  
I shook my head. "You want me to lie for you?" I asked.  
  
Mandy rolled her eyes. "It's not really a lie Pony- I do have a lot of work!" She protested. "And besides what are you going to say to Darry? Sorry Mandy couldn't come back because she promised herself she wouldn't until the end of semester, and then she'd have to see her parents and she doesn't want to because they don't get along. Then you could even go into details about WHY I don't get along with them, and what happened to me a few years back!"  
  
I was a bit surprised at her outburst, so I nodded humbly and said I'd give him her message. Basically since our discussion the other week we hadn't spoken directly about what had happened to her, and there was no way I was getting into it now.  
  
She'd sighed and leant her head against me. "I just don't think it's good timing to go back Pony, you understand don't you?"  
  
I nodded, even though I didn't understand entirely- I knew it was because of what had happened to her, but I didn't understand how that extended to not visiting my family for a wedding. But I didn't press her to explain it to me.  
  
*****  
  
At the airport I heard Soda before I saw him. "PONY!" He called across the terminal, and I felt myself blush a little at his loud greeting, but nonetheless I waved back. When I reached him he gave me a huge hug, as though it had been a long time since he'd seen me when I'd only been at college a few weeks.  
  
"It's a pity Mandy couldn't come." He said as we went to get our luggage.  
  
I laughed, sounding forced to me. "Well you know Mandy- she's a bit of a nerd when it comes to study." I joked. "Tearing her away from her books is a pretty hard task." Mentally I thought about how Eric had expressed similar sentiments to me not too long back.  
  
"Well she's not the only one." Soda teased me. "I seem to remember someone even reading on the toilet."  
  
I felt my face redden again, and changed the subject slightly. "Anyway Mandy tried out for the Cheerleading squad the other week. The list goes up Monday so she's worried about that, but I was watching the tryouts and I don't think she's got anything to worry about. She easily matched it with the best. And last week I moved into the frat house, with my roomie Eric. To tell you the truth I was apprehensive at best, but so far it's been fun. There's always someone there to talk to, or to play ball with or something." I said as we waited for my bag to come out on the carousel.  
  
Soda raised an eyebrow slightly. "Well, well, who would have thought?" He asked sardonically. "My little brother has changed."  
  
"I haven't changed!" I argued angrily. "I'm still the same old Pony."  
  
"Sure sounds like you've changed." Soda challenged me skeptically.  
  
I spotted my bag and grabbed it, and then we walked out to the carpark and got in our old Ford. "I haven't changed exactly," I said as we pulled out. "I just am being open to having new experiences." I sounded just like Mandy when I said it, and it was lucky she wasn't there to give me a look or something to give the game away that it was actually her idea rather than mine!  
  
Soda nodded, and then we spent the majority of the drive catching up on all the news with the gang. Steve and Soda were still working at the garage having a great time. Darry had been promoted to a site manager at his work, the extra money was coming in useful now. Two-Bit actually got a job interview the other day, but he turned up drunk and of course didn't get the job. I smiled and leant back in my seat contentedly as Soda gave me all the details. I hadn't realised it until now, but being all the way over in LA at college, I missed the gang. Sure I had Mandy, but it wasn't the same. I thought about how our relationship was going since she'd told me what had happened to her. In my opinion it was better than ever, especially now I knew she wasn't nagging me to do things with her because she didn't like the person I was, but because she didn't like the person she was. Before I knew it Soda was pulling into the driveway and I was home. 


	12. 

[A/N. Sorry it has taken me so long to update but the last few weeks have been kind of hectic. I had my little brother's 21st to organise, and have been busy working out subjects etc for uni this year.Anyway, here is the next chapter now. It's kind of nice for me to have Pony coming home to the gang for the wedding! I miss writing about them- especially Two-Bit who was always my favorite character in the book!]  
  
TWELVE:  
  
Two-Bit was the first person to hear the car and he came hurrying out to greet me. "The prodigal son returns." He declared grabbing me around the waist and then holding me at arm's length to look at me carefully. "Have they been feeding you all right there? You look a bit pale, a bit thin!"  
  
"Get off!" I said embarrassed, pushing him away. "How have you been anyway? Got a job yet?"  
  
"Not yet." Two-Bit grinned. "Nobody appreciates my talents."  
  
"What talents?" I asked with a grin.  
  
"Drinking, fighting-" Two-Bit began, but I was interrupted by Darry's voice.  
  
"Ponyboy." He called, coming down the front steps. "I'm so glad you could come. I know it was a rush job and all, but it's good to see you."  
  
"Hey Dar," I said, and as he reached me I held out my hand to shake it. Darry regarded it thoughtfully for a moment before shaking his head.  
  
"The least I can do is give my own little brother a hug." He said, and he hugged me briefly. I raised an eyebrow at Soda over Darry's back- since when had Darry been into public shows of affection like this? Soda just grinned back at me.  
  
"I'm starving, why don't we celebrate Pony's coming home with some food?" Two-Bit suggested, and he reached for my backpack.  
  
"That's okay Two-Bit, I've got it." I said, but Two-Bit simply pulled it out of my hand and bounded up the walkway with it. Near the door he turned and looked at us impatiently.  
  
"I see Two-Bit's appetite is still the same." I said.  
  
"Most things still are little buddy." Darry replied as we followed Two-Bit into the house.  
  
"Most." Soda muttered, going straight to the phone to order pizza. It occurred to me that I hadn't thought to ask Soda the most important question- how he was, and whether he was staying here after Darry married? I made a mental note to remember to ask him later on. Soon the pizza arrived and with it Steve and it was like a family reunion. I guess I think of them all as my brothers-even Steve. After all we've been through together we are pretty close, probably a lot closer than some real families. We chatted, ate, drank and smoke for hours, until before I knew it the clock was on eleven and I was yawning.  
  
"What's the matter Pony?" Steve asked me. "Now you're a mature old college student do you get tired easily?"  
  
"No, it's just that there is a time difference between here and LA moron." I replied, and Darry snorted whilst Steve looked annoyed.  
  
"So, have you been to any big parties yet, or have you been too busy studying?" Steve asked, still determined to get the better of me.  
  
"A few frat parties." I said. "I've joined a frat which is pretty cool."  
  
Steve didn't answer this, and I stood up and stretched. "I think I might get to bed though- and shouldn't the rest of you? After all, what time do we have to get up in the morning Darry?"  
  
"About seven." He replied. "We've got to make ourselves look at least half- decent."  
  
"Or," Soda added. "In Two-Bit's case we'll settle for a quarter decent."  
  
Two-Bit was quiet for a moment thinking, and I could almost hear his thoughts: 'A quarter is smaller than a half right?' Then he grinned and jumped up from his seat. "I'm going to get you for that greaser!" A moment later he and Soda were tangled in a heap on the floor. Steve didn't hesitate to jump into the fray. Darry gave me a sheepish grin, and then joined in. I leant against the doorway for a minute watching, before turning and going up to bed. It wasn't that I didn't want to muck around, I was simply wrecked from the flight and the time difference. At least that's what I told myself as I fell asleep quickly in my old room.  
  
*****  
  
I was jolted from my sleep not long later. "Pony? You awake?" Soda asked from the door.  
  
"Nah, come in." I said, even though I HAD been asleep. Soda came over and sat down on the bed next to me.  
  
"Feels weird bein' in back here." He commented. "Although sometimes I come in here and think about how strange it is not having you round and all."  
  
"Soda?" I asked.  
  
"Yeah Pony?" He replied.  
  
"Are you all right? I mean with this marriage and all?" I asked.  
  
Soda laughed. "Sure I'm all right Pony. Just because I had a bad experience with marriage doesn't mean Darry doesn't deserve his chance at happiness. And wait till you meet Helen Pony, she's pretty cool." He said.  
  
I couldn't see his face in the dark, the face which always seemed to betray his true emotions, but his tone was fairly earnest and I felt relieved. "And are you staying here? After the wedding?"  
  
"For now." Soda said. "Darry and I had a chat about it, and he told me that this is my home too and he doesn't want me to feel as though I have to leave- especially not on his behalf. But hell Soda, I'm getting a bit old to still be living at home. Maybe Steve and I'll get a place together one day. Anyway, the reason I came in here was to ask you something I forgot to ask you before. I saw your face when you said Mandy wasn't able to come. You two aren't having trouble are you?"  
  
I hesitated. It would have been nice to confide in my brother about how the first few weeks we'd been unhappy and arguing, but how it was all better now I knew the reason behind it. But Mandy would rather die than someone know her secret. "No, we're fine." I said, and then added "I don't think we've been this good in a long time." That was certainly true. Despite Mandy's not wanting to come home for the wedding we were better than we had been in a long time. The fact that I hadn't judged Mandy when she told me about what had happened to her had probably gone a long way in that.  
  
"That's all right then." Soda said, with a sigh, leaning back against the wall. "Mandy's a pretty cool girl for a Soc."  
  
"She's not really a soc!" I argued.  
  
"She's not a greaser!" Soda countered.  
  
"Maybe she's an in between?" I suggested.  
  
"A bitzer?" Soda suggested with a snort, and I hit him. We both laughed for a few minutes before Soda stopped. "Seriously though Pony, I'm glad you're having fun at college and learning new things. And I'm glad you and Mandy are happy. And I'm also glad about Darry's wedding. Things are finally working out for the Curtis's hey? I used to think, a few years back, things wouldn't ever work out for us."  
  
I nodded slowly. "You know, I think the turning point was London." I suggested.  
  
"What Two-Bit's arrest in the pub for drunk and disorderly and the night he spent in jail because we couldn't afford to get him out?" Soda teased.  
  
"Well that was a highlight." I said laughing. "And when he comes out the next day all he does is eat because he complained they starved him in there."  
  
"And then after we went down to Stonehenge on the way back we decided to stop at the pub for tea and Two-Bit refused to drink alcohol for the first time in his life?" Soda said.  
  
"But seriously," I said. "Think about it. It was the first good thing to happen to us in years, since Mom and Dad died, and Johnny and Dally, and the trouble with you and..well think about it. And then when we got back Darry got that great job, and you got a pay rise and I got Mandy..and everything's been fine from then on. Who said raffles were a waste of money?"  
  
"I believe it was Darry." Soda said, and then he sighed and stood up. "You think too much Pony. I only ever thought of that as a holiday not as a dramatic life-altering occasion. Anyway, it's good to have you home- only if it is for a few days."  
  
"It's good to be home." I replied automatically as Soda went out, shutting the door behind him. But, I told myself, it WAS good to be home. It was always good to be home. Things were just the same as they were when I left and if that wasn't comfort what was? But a nagging thought in the back of my mind told me that I wouldn't always think like this. A college education could possibly change me in more ways than one. 


	13. 

[A/N. Again it has taken me a long time to update and I have no real excuse: only my own laziness. I just uploaded a chapter of one of my other stories and am going to try this weekend to write/upload another chapter of all my stories- whether or not I can do this is another thing..]  
  
THIRTEEN:  
  
"PONY!" Darry bellowed up the stairs the next morning. "Are you getting up?"  
  
Lying in bed I grinned to myself- this sounded just like the old days. I sat up and drew back the curtains. The day was overcast but the sun was struggling to break through. Somehow I always thought it had to be sunny when there was a wedding and cloudy when there was a funeral. I made the mistake of commenting on this one day when I was about thirteen. Soda had snorted. "Pony there are enough people in this town alone for there to be a funeral and a wedding on the same day- so who gets precedence with the weather?" There was no response to that! With a sigh I got up and dressed and then went downstairs. Darry was all dressed and ready in his suit, sipping at a mug of coffee and nibbling a piece of toast. Soda had his shirt and pants on, but no jacket and the shirt was untucked. Two-Bit was already over, and he was dressed properly too, but I reflected with an inward grin, no amount of proper clothing could make Two-Bit look anything but a greaser. Not that he wanted to be anything but a greaser. Some people were happy as they were. That thought struck me like a two-tonne truck- did I want to be something else? Before I could think about this any further Soda spotted me and waved me over towards the table.  
  
"Sit Pony, sit. I'm about to serve my famous waffles." He instructed.  
  
"Can't say no to that." I said, taking a spot at the table. "Dar, aren't you having any waffles?"  
  
"Hmm? Oh, no Pony. Just coffee and toast. I don't seem to have much of an appetite." Darry said.  
  
"He'd have even less of an appetite if we'd been allowed to give him a bucks night." Two-Bit muttered.  
  
"I'd be naked tied to a post somewhere if you'd given me one." Darry corrected. "Anyway, Helen and I both decided we didn't need something like that. Heck the wedding is enough of a celebration for us."  
  
"Darry," Two-Bit said as though he'd said this on countless occasions, and was speaking patiently to a little child who couldn't understand things very well. "The wedding is a celebration for you two together. A bachelors party, or a hens night in Helen's case, is a commiseration of your last night of singledom."  
  
"As I've said before," Darry responded in the same tone as Two-Bit had used. "I don't want to commiserate because for me this isn't the end of the world."  
  
"Yet." Two-Bit replied and I saw Darry frown. But before he could say anything Steve burst into the house calling "Good morning all!"  
  
"Just in time for waffles." Soda said to him, as he heaped them onto plates. He handed me mine, and I poured honey over it. In my mind honey and waffles go together and there is nothing anyone can say to dissuade me from this opinion. I eagerly took a huge mouthful. They were better than I remembered, but then it had been a few months nearly since I'd had them. I took another mouthful before I'd even finished the first and then, without me having any idea how it could have happened, I spilt some honey down the front of my shirt. I didn't even realise until Darry made a noise and managed to choke out "Pony- your shirt!"  
  
I raised an eyebrow and glanced down at my shirt to discover the stain. "Hell." I snapped jumping up from the table and lunging for a cloth to wipe at the stain. "I don't know how that happened."  
  
"Probably from eating like a pig?" Steve offered and I shot him a dirty look.  
  
Darry was shaking his head. "Great Pony, just great. Do you have another white shirt somewhere?"  
  
"This might come off." I said by way of answer. Unfortunately no amount of scrubbing got rid of the stain, only dulled it slightly. But it was still obvious.  
  
"I've got another white shirt upstairs, but it's got a hole under the armpit. You'd have to keep your jacket on all the time." Soda offered.  
  
The idea of being stuck in a jacket was pretty unappealing, but there was no alternative and I nodded my head.  
  
"At least wait until your finished eating first." Darry said with a sigh. "Otherwise you're just as likely to spill something on the other shirt too."  
  
Steve snorted. "Pity you don't have a bib for him hey Darry?" He asked.  
  
I rolled my eyes and sat back down to my waffles. I wondered whether Steve had always been this annoying and rude, or whether the fact that I'd been away made it more obvious to me? Nonetheless I was pretty careful eating the rest of the waffles. Even though the damage had already been done I was determined to eat neatly.  
  
*****  
  
Darry's one extravagance in terms of the wedding was to hire cars to take both us to the church as well as Helen and her bridal party, and then to take us to the restaurant were we there was to be a sort of reception. Darry explained to me that because it was happening in a rush, and because they didn't have a hell of a lot of money, it was easier to have a small reception rather than the more elaborate ones many people have. "Besides," He added. "It's not like we've got a lot of relatives who we'd need to invite or anything, and Helen's relatives are not a huge bunch either." That sparked my interest slightly and I asked how many of Helen's friends or relatives would be at the church and the reception. Darry looked thoughtful for a moment. "Well there's her parents, her sister and her best friend who are both the bridesmaids, her sister's kid who is the flowergirl, her brother, and a few friends and her grandparents and Aunt, Uncle and cousin." He replied. I thought the church might look a bit lopsided then, but didn't comment. After all if Darry didn't want to invite a lot of people who was I to complain?  
  
"Cars are here." Two-Bit yelled.  
  
We all made our way out the front to the two cars. Helen and her bridal party were taking two cars over from her parent's place, although as I'd discovered earlier that morning she virtually lived at our place already. Most of her things had been moved in before.  
  
"I coulda' just dressed up the Ford." Soda commented, but Darry shook his head.  
  
"I don't think Helen would have been too impressed Soda." He replied.  
  
We all piled into the cars- Darry, Soda and I in one, and then Two-Bit and Steve in the other. Soda and I were Darry's best men and it reminded me a little of when Soda had married Sandy a few years back. Hopefully though this marriage wouldn't end up the same as that one!  
  
As we drove Darry finally related to me the tale of how he met Helen, and it was actually quite boring. "It was when you were sitting your SAT's actually Pony, but it wasn't until after you went to college that we started to date seriously. It's really a pretty boring story though I'm afraid. The boss asked me to go over to this house to do a quote on extending it. They wanted to build on a games room, where they could have a bar, and perhaps a pool table. That house turned out to be Helen's parent's place. And that's how I met her." He shrugged. "And then we exchanged numbers but we never were able to really get together due to conflicting timetables so to speak until a few months back.and the rest, well the rest is history."  
  
"A games room?" I repeated confused. "I thought Helen was like us- I thought she was a greaser?"  
  
"Like us." Soda muttered with a strange look on her face, and then louder he said "She is."  
  
"We don't have no bar and games room." I argued. "Socs do though."  
  
"Her father got a lot of money from a car accident." Darry explained. "And he decided to do something his children and the rest of the friends and family could enjoy and have fun in."  
  
"Oh, okay." I replied, and then I saw that the car was turning into the gates of the small church in which the wedding was to take place. "We're here Dar- all ready?"  
  
"Sure." Darry replied, ever unflappable. If it were me marrying Mandy I'd be a bunch of nerves, but that's Darry for you.  
[A/N. The wedding and reception will go in the next chapter, and I guess after that Pony better get back to college, where I have a feeling a few surprises are awaiting him...] 


	14. 

FOURTEEN:  
  
"Hello Darryl. I'm glad to see you scrubbed up so well." An older woman, with graying hair, and sparkling blue eyes came over to hug Darry.  
  
"Hi." Darry replied. "Actually I'm just glad these kids scrubbed up so well." He indicated us.  
  
"With a few minor hiccups." Soda corrected, glancing at me with a grin. I sighed and drew my jacket round me tighter. I didn't think this woman, who I was assuming was Helen's mother, would look too kindly on the holes in the shirt Soda had lent me.  
  
"Hello Sodapop." She said smiling. And then she looked at me. "You must be Ponyboy, back from college."  
  
I nodded. "Hi." I said.  
  
She gave me a cursory glance, and then turned back to Darry. "Well we better all get inside so Helen can make her grand entrance. Wait until you see her wedding dress- we spared no expense on this one."  
  
Her choice of words made me think: 'We spared no expense on THIS one.' What did she mean by that? But I didn't have time to think about it as I was being hurried into the church. The side which housed our friends and relatives was fairly sparse, although Helen's side more than made up for it.  
  
"See the knock out blonde in the third row." Soda whispered to me.  
  
"I've got my own knock out waiting for me back at college." I whispered back. I hadn't thought about Mandy much since I arrived home- something which I'd be sure to keep from her! But thinking about her now made me realise that I'd be glad to get back there tomorrow and see her. If it was like this after only being apart for a few days I wondered what it would be like for longer. And then I wondered whether or not she was missing me as much as I now missed her.  
  
The priest organised us into where we were to stand and I followed obediently, although I did wonder why Darry was having a priest- he wasn't exactly the religious type was he? A few minutes later the music began, and Helen slowly walked up the aisle towards us. As she walked I studied her carefully. She was a pretty enough girl, and her smile was a wonder, but in my opinion she didn't look like Darry's type. Not that I really knew what Darry's type was...I shook my head slightly to get the thoughts out of my mind. Was it just because of Soda's failed wedding that I was thinking like this?  
  
The ceremony itself was pretty boring, but that's just me. Darry didn't seem at all bored by it, and Soda was busy exchanging long looks with the knock out blonde he'd noticed earlier. I glanced over at where our friends were sitting and saw Two-Bit busily making a paper plane out of the wedding program. Some people really would never change, which was a pretty comforting thought when you thought about it. Finally, after what seemed like forever to me, Darry and Helen were pronounced "husband and wife" and we were able to leave the church.  
  
"Nice wedding wasn't it?" someone beside me asked once we were outside the church and Darry and Helen were posing for photos. There was no official photographer as that was a bit too expensive, but relatives were happily snapping away and playing photographer for the day.  
  
I turned around to see one of Helen's bridesmaids. A smallish girl with thick black hair piled up on her head. She had a heart shaped face, and a lovely smile.  
  
"I guess so." I said. "But when I get married I think I might skip all the boring talking bits."  
  
She laughed. "I doubt your future wife would agree with that." She said.  
  
I shrugged. I didn't know whether Mandy would agree or not, we'd never really talked about an actual wedding. Sometimes we'd talked about the future: two kids and a house with a picket fence, but never the actual wedding. And it occurred to me that if I DID marry Mandy, her parents wouldn't let us have a small ceremony. It would be one huge one!  
  
"I suppose you've got plenty of time to think about that hmm?" She asked.  
  
I shrugged again. "I hope so."  
  
"So you're Ponyboy right?" She asked.  
  
I raised an eyebrow. "Yeah, how did you know?"  
  
"Well I've met Soda before, and Helen said both Darry's brothers were being his groomsmen, so the process of elimination leaves me with Ponyboy." She said, with a laugh.  
  
I laughed too. "Good work, but call me Pony please, everyone does."  
  
"Okay Pony." She said, tossing her head to get rid of the stray strands in her face. "You've certainly got interesting names in this family."  
  
"Yeah," I agreed. "My parents were pretty original."  
  
A funny smile crossed her face. "That was your cue to ask me my name." She teased me.  
  
"Oh. Right. What's your name?" I asked embarrassed.  
  
"Chantelle." She said with a laugh. "Not as original as your names but it's up there."  
  
"Sure is." I agreed.  
  
"PONY! Come here for photos..and you too Chantelle!" someone called and I sighed. I wasn't exactly a huge fan of having my photo taken, but what choice did I have?  
  
As we walked over there Chantelle leant closer to me and whispered "I hate having my photo taken. I don't think I'm very photogenic."  
  
I looked at her in surprise. Not because she hated having her photo taken, but because she thought she wasn't photogenic. "Don't worry," I assured her. "You're beautiful, and your hair up like that looks really good."  
  
She smiled again. "Thanks Pony- and let me tell you, you look pretty good too."  
  
"Thanks." I said with a wry grin. I didn't think that was completely true, but at the same time hearing it didn't do my ego any harm.  
  
As we reached the wedding party Chantelle whispered to me again "Can I have the first dance Pony?"  
  
I shrugged. "I don't dance very well, but if you're game, sure."  
  
"I think I'll take that chance." She told me.  
  
"Why were you hiding?" Soda greeted me. "Did you think you'd get out of having your photo taken?"  
  
"I don't know, but it didn't work did it." I said with a sigh, lining up with the rest of the bridal party in front of the crowd snapping photos.  
  
"It's a pity Mandy isn't here." Soda commented. "She'd love this wedding."  
  
"She'd probably cry." I remarked wryly. "Why is it girls cry at weddings?"  
  
Soda shook his head. "I don't know Pony, I think that's just another one of the many mysteries of women..When it comes to weddings- well they're just a little stranger than usual."  
  
After the photos were over- and in my mind they went forever and my face was beginning to get sore from the permanent smile I was showing- Helen cornered me to ask me what I thought of the wedding. I thought back to my comments to Chantelle about the speeches going too long, and then Soda's comment about how women were strange when it came to weddings. "It was lovely." I assured her.  
[A/N. I know I was going to make this the last chapter before Pony goes back to college, but another idea came into my head, one which will go well, or at least interestingly, with the one I've all ready got. So you're going to have to wait for Pony's return to college and the promised surprises in store for him there....] 


	15. 

FIFTEEN:  
The restaurant were the wedding reception was to be held had a fairly small reception room which is what Darry and Helen had hired. There was a long table along the top which was the bridal table, and then lined up along the sides were a few smaller tables which I assumed were for the guests. Soda's comment before the photos had made me think and I wished Mandy was there. I know it sounds stupid but there was a strange feeling I had got all of a sudden which concerned me a little and made me wish I was on my way back to LA right then. I can't explain it any further than that though, since I don't really understand it myself.  
  
"Hey look Pony-you're seated next to me." Chantelle said, appearing all of a sudden next to me.  
  
I glanced down at the placecards and realised this was so. Well it could have been worse- a lot worse!  
  
"I'll be back in a moment buddy." Soda whispered to me. "I'm going to talk to the knock out blonde."  
  
I rolled my eyes, and took my seat. On one side of me was Chantelle. On the other was Helen's mother. Then came Darry and Helen, Helen's father, Soda and another bridesmaid. I glanced around to see where Two-Bit and Steve were sitting- they had a table up the back of the room where they'd already commandeered two large bottles of beer. I grinned to myself and wished I were sitting down there with them instead of up here.  
  
"What are you smiling at?" Chantelle asked me.  
  
I told her, and her smile faded. "Oh." She said softly.  
  
I could have kicked myself then- I hadn't meant to offend her. "Sorry," I hastily apoligised. "I didn't mean anything by that. It's just because I've been away at college and all I haven't seen the gang in a long time.."  
  
"That's okay." Chantelle replied, still softer than usual.  
  
"So," I decided to change the subject. "Do you know how long this reception is going to go for?"  
"Anxious to leave are you?" Chantelle asked, but she smiled. "I think only about three hours- they charge by the hour here and Darry and Helen couldn't afford much more than that."  
  
A sudden thought struck me: Darry had told me that Helen's parents had got a lot of money awhile back- and didn't the bride's parents usually help out with weddings? I leant closer to Chantelle so nobody could hear and asked her this.  
  
She laughed. "Are you kidding? My Aunt and Uncle are tighter than a-well let's just say they're tight and leave it at that."  
  
"Even though they got that money?" I asked.  
  
"Especially though." Chantelle corrected. "See the thing is-when my Uncle hurt himself he decided the world owed HIM and he owed nothing."  
  
I nodded slowly. "It's a pity they didn't help though- the wedding could have been a lot better."  
  
Chantelle nodded too. "Sure." She agreed, and then she grinned. "The food's on its way."  
  
"Already?" I asked surprised.  
  
"Yep, remember I told you- they've only got three hours, and we've been here nearly twenty minutes now. By the time everyone's eaten their main meal and desert it will be perhaps another forty minutes." Chantelle explained.  
  
Well far be it from me to pass up food! The main meal was either chicken in white sauce and vegetables, or beef with vegetables. Alternating meals were served so people all had different things, but when Chantelle received her beef she looked disgusted. "I only eat white meat." She told me.  
  
"Ask them to cover it with white sauce then it will be white meat." I replied, and she rolled her eyes.  
  
"I suppose I can eat the vegetables and the potatoes.." She said with a sigh.  
  
I sighed too, and then pushed my plate towards her. "Here, you have my chicken and I'll take the beef then." I offered.  
  
Her eyes lit up. "Thanks Pony." She said. "You're a sweetie."  
  
I shrugged, and got stuck into my beef. As I ate I saw Two-Bit and Steve go through more and more bottles of beer with their meal. They were in the process of building a tower out of the empties, but every now and then it would crash over since the bottles weren't the best building material in the world. Everyone in the room would jump at the noise, and I noticed Helen's mother glaring at them, her lips tight with anger. Darry, though, was smiling. I suppose he's used to them though. Helen got the attention of one of the waiters. "Do you think we could have the music on while we eat?" She asked. He nodded and went off to fix it. "Good idea darling," Helen's mother said to her. "It might drown out some of the noise from up the back."  
  
Desert was either chocolate cake, or cheesecake. I knew which one I wanted, and when I got the chocolate cake there was no way I'd swap with anyone!  
  
Helen leant over to us. "After we eat we'll wait a bit and then have the bridal waltz. Firstly Darry and I dance, and then at Mom's signal you two join us, as do Soda and his partner. And then after a bit our parents join in as well. And then all the guests do."  
  
Chantelle laughed. "Told you I had the first dance Pony." She told me, but I wasn't really listening. Darry hadn't mentioned this to me- I didn't want to dance when everyone would be watching. When I said this Helen's mother laughed.  
  
"Pony, I don't think their eyes are going to be on you- they're going to be on the newlyweds." She told me with a little laugh.  
  
"Technically yes," I replied. "But they can still see me!"  
  
"It's hardly a big deal." Helen's mother replied, dismissing the subject, and turning away. I made a face at her back, and I saw Darry's mouth twitch as he noticed it.  
  
"Don't worry." Chantelle whispered to me. "I know how to waltz, so just follow my lead. And also don't worry about my Aunt- she can be a bit funny sometimes."  
  
It seemed like it wasn't much longer before it was time for the dreaded dance. We all stood up as Darry led Helen onto the dance floor. Soda came over to me and whispered that the two of them had taken waltzing lessons to make sure they did it right. I snorted at that, and earnt a disapproving look from Helen's mother. I had to admit though, the dancing lessons had really paid off. Darry and Helen glided around the floor in perfect unison- looking every bit the married couple. A moment later Helen's mom gave us a signal, and we were out on the dance floor. It turned out to be a lot easier than I had thought it would be, and I grinned at Chantelle. "This ain't so bad." I told her. She laughed and said that she'd told me so. As we danced near Two-Bit and Steve we received whistles and claps. "Lookin' good Pony!" One of them yelled out. Helen's parents joined in with the dance, and then everyone else came onto the dance floor as well. I saw Two- Bit and Steve indulging in their own wild dance up the end, and quite a few of the other guests watched them and laughed. I knew Helen's mother wouldn't be too impressed if she saw it. As the music finished Chantelle leant closer to me, and then she kissed me. I was shocked at first, but then, without even hardly knowing what I was doing, I kissed her back. When we pulled apart she smiled at me. "I've been wanting to do that ever since I first saw you Pony." She told me. I didn't know what to say: I'd just let another girl kiss me.....  
[A/N. And I'll have to leave it there for now since I've got to get ready and go out now.] 


	16. 

[A/N. Another chapter which has taken me ages to post. But now I am back at Uni properly it's a little harder to find the time. And this is also a bit shorter than usual, but that's all right I think.]  
SIXTEEN:  
As we continued to dance she leant her head on my shoulder in a gesture of familiarity which kind of freaked me out a bit. To all the world we could pass for a couple- something we were not. She looked up at me, with a big smile on her face and her eyes gleaming. "I didn't think this wedding was going to be much fun you know, but I'm glad to have been proven wrong."  
  
I didn't know what to say to that, so I said nothing wondering how I was going to get myself out of this one. Not only with Chantelle, but if any of the gang had seen her kiss me. And then of course there was Mandy..  
  
"Pony?" Chantelle was saying. "Are you there Pony?" She waved a hand across in front of my face.  
  
"Sorry, what?" I asked.  
  
"The dance is over. We can go back to our seats now." Chantelle replied with a shake of her head. "Your head must have been somewhere else."  
  
'Somewhere else?' I thought wryly as she grasped my hand and pulled me back towards our seat. 'Try back at college with my girlfriend, who will kill me if she finds out I just kissed another girl.'  
  
We sat down and I immediately picked up my glass of beer and downed almost the whole thing. My god, how was I going to explain this one? Darry and Helen came over then both laughing about something. "Nice dancing Pon," Darry said to me as he sat down. "I guess Mandy hasn't taught you to dance yet?"  
  
"No." I admitted.  
  
"Whose Mandy?" Chantelle asked, after Darry and Helen began talking to someone else.  
  
"My girlfriend." I replied wishing there was more beer in my glass.  
  
Chantelle bit her lip and looked away. Then she looked back. "I didn't know you had a girlfriend." She accused.  
  
"Well you never asked me as such." I said. "But remember you asked about the lucky girl I'd marry?"  
  
"Why didn't you say yeah, and her name is Mandy?" Chantelle demanded her eyes flashing. "Honestly, you're just like every other man."  
  
I wished she'd keep her voice down. "Chantelle you never gave me a chance to tell you. And to be honest I didn't know I had to tell you."  
  
"What?" she asked her voice dangerous and low.  
  
"Well I don't bring up my girlfriend to every person I meet." I tried to explain.  
  
She took it the wrong way. "Do you bring her up to every person you kiss?" She asked with a frown.  
  
"The way I remember it you were the one who kissed me." I argued, getting a bit annoyed now. She was beginning to get on my nerves. As the waiter came past I grabbed another beer off his tray, and Chantelle got another wine.  
  
"And you didn't stop me!" Chantelle said angrily. "You could have pulled away."  
  
"And then you would have been offended.." I said, although I knew it was a lame excuse. Later on I was going to have to do some serious thinking about why I hadn't pulled away, about why I had kissed her back.  
  
"Wouldn't it have been better for me to be offended than for me to be upset and angry?" Chantelle asked.  
  
Before I could answer Helen's Dad stood up and was calling for our attention. "Now before we send these two newlyweds off on their wedding night-" there were catcalls from the back where Soda was now sitting with Two-Bit, Steve and a few girls. "-I thought I'd like to say a few words. I've always been protective of my little girl and I never really thought any of the men she dated were good enough for her, but when I met Darry he impressed me with his honesty, his integrity, and above all his love for Helen. I hope that the two of them are going to be very happy together and I wish them all the best for the future."  
  
Everyone clapped dutifully and then Darry stood up. "I don't want to make this long because I'm not really one for speeches-" "Unless they're lectures!" Soda yelled from the back. "-So I just want to thank everyone for coming. I especially want to thank Helen's parents for their help with this lovely ceremony, and also my brothers Soda and Pony for being here on this important day. In particular Pony who had to come back from college for this when he should probably have been studying. It's also a pity his lovely girlfriend Mandy wasn't able to make it. We're taking bets between us all and we're pretty sure they'll be next. If this is the case I only hope they're as happy as Helen and I are. Thank you."  
  
"Next huh?" Chantelle muttered, and then without any prior warning she picked up her wine glass and emptied it on my head. "I hope you two are very happy together." She said, and she turned and hurried from the room.  
  
The entire room were staring at me in shock. A few laughs went around but mostly they were surprised. "And.um.on that note..we should probably see the lovely couple off." Helen's Dad said looking a bit shocked. One of Helen's bridesmaids hurried after Chantelle and Helen shot me a dirty look. I frowned wondering how this was all my fault?  
  
We were told to form a circle, and the bride and groom went around thanking everyone and saying goodbye. When Darry got to me his first words were "What did you do?"  
  
"Nothing." I protested, feeling like a little kid. "She didn't know I had a girlfriend and for some reason that pissed her off."  
  
Darry looked like he would have said something else, but he didn't have the time. I stood there uncomfortably and then Helen reached me. "I hope you're happy." She muttered. "You could have ruined my wedding with that little stunt."  
  
"I didn't do anything." I protested again, feeling even smaller than before if that was possible.  
  
"Whatever." She said and she went on to the next person. Soda made his way over to me as the circle broke up.  
  
"One minute you're pashing her- the next she's tipping wine over you. Talk about blowing hot and cold Pony." He said dryly.  
  
"She's nuts." I replied, trying to act tough. "I don't even know what sparked her off."  
  
Two-Bit and Steve arrived then. "Great show Pony." Two-Bit told me proudly. "You made the night more interesting.I was thinking you should have thrown your beer at her, but then I decided that would have been a waste of good beer. Women hey?"  
  
Steve was looking at me thoughtfully, but he didn't say anything.  
  
Darry and Helen left, and then we got in a taxi and went back home. I didn't really join in the conversation on the way home. I was a bit embarrassed about what had happened, as well as annoyed. As far as I could see I had never given Chantelle the impression that there was anything going on between us, nor that anything could go on between us, so her passionate reaction shocked me. But in the back of my mind was a more pressing concern: did I tell Mandy about this? And how? 


	17. 

SEVENTEEN:  
  
Soda yawned as the taxi arrived at our house. "I'm stuffed. We shouldn't have stayed up so late last night." He said, unlocking the front door.  
  
Steve lingered out the front. "I guess I should get going. I'll see you Monday morning Soda- bright and early."  
  
Soda just groaned and went inside. Two-Bit, who was crashing at our place apparently, followed Soda inside, but I hesitated. There was something in the way Steve was looking at me which gave me the impression he hadn't finished yet. So I waited patiently, wondering how Soda could be friends with someone like this. There was certainly no love lost between the two of us, but it had always been that way, as far back as I could remember. One of my early memories was from when I was about ten and Soda and Steve were building a fort in one of the trees in our backyard. I'd wanted to join in, but Steve hadn't been too impressed. Pretending later that it was an accident he pushed me out of the fort, and I ended up spraining my ankle so badly my mom had to take me to the emergency room.  
  
"So you certainly put on a good show tonight." Steve told me, lighting a cigarette.  
  
"Thank you." I replied sarcastically.  
  
"Mandy wouldn't be too happy to hear about it would she? I thought you loved her Pony?" Steve asked me.  
  
"I do love her!" I protested. "And I don't know why it happened. She kissed me and I just kissed her back without even thinking. Then when I realised I was shocked."  
  
"She'll be pissed when she sees the photos." Steve commented, taking a drag of his cigarette and exhaling a plume of smoke into the night sky.  
  
"What's your point Steve?" I asked, deciding it was time to cut to the chase. I was no longer a kid who needed the approval of my brother's friends. I couldn't care less what Steve thought of me, and I was tired.  
  
"Who says I need a point? " Steve drawled with a smile. He stubbed his cigarette out on the lawn. "Don't be surprised when she dumps your sorry butt Pony. She's always been too good for someone like you anyway. But enough of the small talk."  
  
"Someone like me?" I spat, ignoring his last words. "I'm just like you Steve. I'm a greaser and I'm proud of it."  
  
"A greaser? Proud?" Steve laughed. "Maybe you should go and talk to Soda- ask him how he feels about you now you've changed?"  
  
"I haven't changed." I argued.  
  
"Bullshit Pony." Steve snapped, not mincing words. "That's what I wanted to talk to you about, I just got distracted by your display tonight. You go off to that fancy college with fancy friends- Soda even told me you joined a frat for crying out loud- you're not one of us anymore."  
  
I was shocked. "I haven't changed that much." I repeated.  
  
"You honestly believe that?" Steve asked shaking his head. "If you do, well you're even stupider than I always thought you were. Look- do us all a favor Pony, go back to your college tomorrow and don't come back."  
  
My jaw dropped in surprise. Sure Steve didn't like me, but to say something like that. I didn't know what to say, but it didn't matter since Steve was walking off anyway. I dropped down onto the front step and lit a cigarette. I wondered whether he was telling the truth- did my own brother's think I had changed so much in the last month or two? I furrowed my brow thinking about it as objectively as I could. Yes I'd changed a little bit, but that was what growing up and going away to college was all about? But how could Steve claim I had changed so much? I took a deep drag of my cigarette and shook my head. Maybe he should talk to Mandy who claimed I hadn't changed enough, that I was still the same as before. Thinking of Mandy made me think of what I'd done to her that night. I had kissed another woman, even though I hadn't been the one to make the first move. I stood up, throwing my cigarette away angrily. I had nothing to be ashamed of. I hadn't changed too much, I was still me, and as for the episode with Chantelle, well it was nothing!  
  
I went inside and up to my room pausing outside Soda's room. Even though I had disregarded Steve's comments I still wondered whether Soda felt that way, but I didn't know how to bring up the topic. Why hadn't he said anything to me if he felt as strongly as Steve was claiming he felt? 'Because' said a voice inside my head. 'Steve is talking crap as usual.'  
  
I sighed as I got into bed. It would be good to get back to college and to Mandy. 


	18. 

[A/N. Sorry this chapter isn't too long, but I wanted to post something since I've made a concerted effort to post new chapters for all my stories this weekend. I've only got to post this one, and two others, so I should be right. And then I can get on with my next two essays without thinking, but I really should write some more of my stories!]  
  
EIGHTEEN:  
  
"Pony, get your lazy butt outta' bed." Soda said, shaking me awake the next morning. "We've got to get to the airport or you'll miss your flight."  
  
"Go 'way." I muttered, trying to roll over and go back to sleep, but Soda wouldn't let me. The next thing I knew he was dragging me out of the bed, and I fell onto the floor, waking up with a bump. "Damn you Soda!" I complained as I got gingerly to my feet.  
  
He grinned at me. "Screw you greaser." He said.  
  
I didn't comment, instead I thought again about Steve's comments the night before, about how I had changed and should go back to college and not come back.  
  
Soda appeared to be waiting for something, and I realised that normally a comment like that would start a playfight, but now that I'd started thinking about what Steve had said I wasn't in the mood. "I'm going to have a shower." I muttered, and I hurried out of the room.  
  
The warm shower made me feel slightly better, but I wondered whether there was any way to broach the topic with Soda. I couldn't just say to him "Hey Soda, Steve reckons I've changed and I don't fit in anymore. He thinks I should stay at college and not come back. Do you feel like that?" And then even worse- what if he said "Well Steve's right- I just didn't want to say it to you. However now that you've brought the subject up I think you've practically turned into a soc Pony, so maybe Steve's right- if you left us alone we'd be a lot better off." I shook my head to get rid of the thoughts- there was no way Soda would say something like that, he was my brother for god's sake.  
  
I went downstairs, sniffing the air. Soda had cooked bacon and eggs, and I gladly helped myself to a liberal serving. Two-Bit was sitting at the kitchen table looking half-asleep.  
  
"Not a bad night hey Pony?" He asked through a mouthful of food.  
  
"Yeah, not bad." I replied casually, taking a sip of my coffee.  
  
Soda was looking at me thoughtfully. "You're going to tell her aren't you Pony?" He asked me.  
  
I knew what he was talking about without having to ask him. "I probably will yeah." I admitted.  
  
"Don't do it Pon." Soda advised me. "It was no big deal really, but a girl would make it into a big deal."  
  
"Soda, Mandy and I are honest with each other." I said, putting my knife and fork down. "That's the point of a mature relationship."  
  
Two-Bit raised an eyebrow. "Pity one of you isn't mature isn't it Pony?" He asked, but I ignored his comment.  
  
"Listen Soda, Mandy and I've had a few problems since we started at college, and even though it's all sorted out now, and it wasn't even as bad as I thought it was, I don't want something like that to happen again." I argued.  
  
Soda snorted. "Right so you go back and tell her what happened and you honestly think that she's not going to be mad? That she's simply going to thank you for your honesty." He shook his head. "Seriously Pony, that's not going to happen."  
  
"What would you know?" I asked angrily. "I'm going to and get my stuff." I went upstairs and got my stuff, taking a few deep breaths. It wasn't like me to go off at Soda, at least not lately, and maybe it was because I knew he was right- telling Mandy what had happened could be like signing a death warrant on our relationship, but at the same time, I wanted to be mature and honest about things with her. Didn't that count for something?  
  
"Ready to go Pony?" Soda asked, avoiding my eyes as I came back into the room.  
  
I nodded soberly. Two-Bit waved to me. "See you next holidays Pony- behave yourself out there." He told me. "And eat up- I'm worried the next time I see you I won't see you. Skinny bones."  
  
I rolled my eyes at him, and Soda and I went out to the car. The drive to the airport passed in a cold silence. Soda was clearly annoyed at me for cracking it with him, and my mind was in turmoil. It seemed like so much had happened the last few days and I didn't know how to put it all into perspective. Not only my stolen kiss, but also a realisation that I had changed, but I didn't know how much.  
  
We went into the airport and I checked my bags and showed my ticket. Soda and I stood around near the gate waiting for my flight to be called, neither of us speaking. Eventually my flight was called.  
  
"Well say bye to Darry for me." I muttered.  
  
"Right. See you Pony." Soda replied.  
I hesitated, wanting to say something to make things feel better, but not knowing what to say, not even knowing how Soda and my friends even felt about me anymore after Steve's comments. I sighed, and walked through to the plane.  
  
*****  
  
A few hours later I got off the plane in LA and looked around for Mandy, but instead I saw Randy, waving at me.  
  
"Hi, how was the wedding?" He asked.  
  
"Good, yeah." I replied. "Where is Mandy?"  
  
"Um.she was busy so she asked me to come." Randy said.  
  
Was it my imagination or did he look away when he said that? We walked through the terminal and towards his car- a flashy jeep which pretty much screamed "SOC!"  
  
"So I saw your roommate last night at the bar. He was pretty drunk." Randy said as we drove along the freeway.  
  
"That would be right." I said with a smile. In the few months Eric and I had been rooming together- including the short time in the frat house- I'd noticed that he certainly did drink a fair bit. I got the impression it was sort of a rebellion for him.  
  
It wasn't long before we were back at college. I threw my things in my room and then hurried to visit Mandy. As I was walking down the steps of the frat house I heard Randy call from his window "Where are you going Pony?"  
  
"To visit Mandy, mom." I called back, amused at his attitude.  
  
"I said she was busy, didn't I?" Randy called to me.  
  
"I'm sure she won't mind me coming to say hello since I've been away all weekend." I called back with a grin.  
  
"I don't think she's in her room." Randy said slowly.  
  
"Well I'll find out." I said with a wave. And I hurried over towards Mandy's dormitory. 


	19. 

[A/N. Please excuse this chapter being a bit shorter, a bit more hurried and not as good as usual, but I've got a cold and I've also got two essays to write on this week I've got off Uni. After I finish this story I am going to try and finish the one before this, where the gang was in London because I don't like the idea of having a story not finished.]  
  
NINETEEN:  
  
As I walked towards Mandy's dorm I thought about the events of the weekend. I still wasn't sure how to tell Mandy what had happened, but I knew I had to tell her. If I didn't the guilt would eat at me and she'd know there was something on my mind. As Randy had predicted Mandy wasn't in her room, and so I turned and went to find her where she would probably be- the library. After all hadn't she said she couldn't come with me to Darry's wedding because of homework? To my surprise there was no sign of her in the library, and I was forced to go back to my dorm.  
  
As I entered I passed Eric, who was on his way out. "Hey Pony, how was the wedding?" He asked.  
  
"It was all right." I said slowly. There was no way I could tell Eric what had happened at the wedding. He'd probably congratulate me and then offer to take me out for a drink to celebrate it.  
  
"Yeah, just all right hey?" Eric asked. "No good looking girls there?"  
  
I was sure my face went red at this, and I muttered that I hadn't noticed. I was however saved by the bell, so to speak. "OI! Hollingworth, wait up." Someone called. A moment later the president of the frat came running out. "Are you going to the bar?"  
  
"Sure am." Eric said with a grin. "I guess you're heading there too."  
  
"Where else?" The frat president asked with a laugh. Then he noticed me. "Hello, Pony isn't it?"  
  
I nodded.  
  
"Well Pony, how are you enjoying frat life?" The president asked me.  
  
I was tempted to tell him that for me it wasn't much different to being back in the dorm, but then I decided that probably wouldn't be the wisest response, so I told him it was great.  
  
"Want to come to the bar with Daniel and I?" Eric asked me.  
  
I shook my head. "I've got to find Mandy. She seems to have disappeared off the face of the earth." I replied.  
  
"Who?" Daniel asked interested.  
  
"His girlfriend- Mandy." Eric replied. A moment later they went to the bar and I went inside. Instead of going to my room I went to Randy's. I wanted to ask him something. I knocked on the door and a moment later he called out for me to come in.  
  
"Hey man." He greeted me.  
  
"Hey." I replied. "Listen do you know where Mandy is? I checked her room and the library and couldn't find her. You said she was too busy to come and pick me up from the airport, and then you said I wouldn't find her in her room. Where is she?"  
  
Randy looked at the ground for a moment, and then shrugged. "I know she's studying, but that's all I know." He told me quickly.  
  
I frowned. "Randy, what's the problem?" I asked, wondering why he was acting so strange.  
  
"There's no problem. So, you study any on the weekend? You don't want to get behind." Randy asked, changing the subject.  
  
I decided that it didn't matter, and let him change the subject happily. "Not exactly. I was too busy." I said. And then I decided that if I couldn't tell Eric what had happened I could tell Randy. It's funny though- we never got along back in high school and now we were becoming friends. Randy listened as I told him what had happened and he didn't speak until I was finished and I asked him whether I should tell Mandy or not?  
  
"I don't know." He said slowly. "Normally I'd say no, but in the current circumstances I think perhaps you should tell her."  
  
"What current circumstances?" I demanded.  
  
Randy shook his head. "I've probably said more than I should have already Pony. I'm Mandy's friend, but I like to think that I'm your friend too. You're going to have to ask her what's going on. Not me."  
  
Back in my room I pondered over what Randy could possibly mean. I frowned, angry at Mandy for not coming to pick me up when she'd promised all along she would, and angry at her for obviously having a secret with Randy which I was not privy to. Then a thought suddenly occurred to me: all of a sudden I had a clear idea of where I'd heard the name "Daniel" before. Could it be that my frat president was the one who'd hurt Mandy all those years before? My anger at Mandy was now transferred to Daniel, and I decided that maybe, just maybe, I felt like going to the bar after all. 


	20. 

[A/N. This is the second last chapter. YAY! For awhile there I was thinking I probably would never get it done, but now it looks as though I am going to!]  
  
TWENTY.  
  
The bar was pretty crowded but it didn't take me long to spot Eric and Daniel. They were both drinking beers and looked as though they were having a great time. I took a deep breath- for all I knew I was barking up the wrong tree, but if I was right, and this was the person who had scarred Mandy for life I wasn't going to let him get away with it.  
  
I approached the two of them and Eric noticed me. "Hey Pony, you changed your mind." He said. "Get a beer and join us."  
  
"Sure," I said. "I think I will."  
  
I got my beer and then joined them back at the small table where they were sitting.  
  
"So did you find Mandy?" Eric asked.  
  
"Nah, she's studying but I've got no idea where." I replied, taking a sip of my beer and glancing at Daniel out the corner of my eye.  
  
"Hey, did she tell you she made the cheerleading squad?" Eric asked suddenly.  
  
I frowned. "No."  
  
"The lists were posted early and I checked them out. She's on the squad." Eric explained to me.  
  
"Mandy from the cheerleading squad?" Daniel asked slowly.  
  
"Yeah, do you know her?" I asked as casually as I could possibly manage.  
  
"Not exactly no." Daniel said. "Excuse me for a moment guys- anyone else ready for another beer?"  
  
"No, I'm right." Eric said, and I nodded my agreement.  
  
Daniel walked off and I sighed and leant against the table thoughtfully. "Eric- do you know Daniel well?" I asked.  
  
"Well enough." Eric replied. "I've told you about us."  
  
"Yeah," I said. "Just out of curiosity, what was it that he actually took the blame for?"  
  
Eric made a face. "I didn't think it was too much of a big time at the deal, but of course my parents did. I stole some things and Daniel took the blame for me because I'd helped him out before at a summer camp we used to go to. Of course that wasn't his fault either- the girl was asking for it."  
  
I almost choked on my beer. 'The girl was asking for it?' Did Eric know it was Mandy who Daniel had raped? "Asking for it hey?" I asked, trying to seem as though I was completely and utterly in control.  
"Yeah, she was following him round everywhere, wouldn't leave him alone. So really she only got what she wanted all along." Eric said.  
  
"What she wanted.." I muttered. "What was her name?"  
  
"Her name?" Eric looked confused. "God, why would you want to know that? I think it was Amanda or something like that. A posh little thing she was- but then we all were at that camp. It was like our parents sent us there to keep us out of their hair for the summer."  
  
And now I knew for sure: Amanda was Mandy, and Daniel was the one who had raped her. I didn't think Eric had made the connection though or he would have said something which would have given him away. I took a deep breath. My first instinct was to go over to Daniel and smack him, but I thought better of it. After all he was pretty popular on the campus, and there were probably quite a few people in the bar who would jump to his defence. But it sure explained how come Mandy had been acting strange since we got to college- I knew what she had said it was but she was getting stranger as the time went on. I drained the last of my beer.  
  
"Sorry Eric, but I've just realised there's something I've got to do." I said standing up.  
  
"Sure, but are you all right Pony?" Eric asked. "You look kind of pale."  
  
"Pale?" I repeated. "No I'm not pale. I'm fine. I've got to go."  
  
And I hurried out of the bar and towards Mandy's dorm. I wondered why I hadn't made the connection before, and further why Mandy hadn't told me who it was who had hurt her so badly. And I also made up my mind that I was going to have to leave the frat house as soon as possible- there was no way that I was staying in the same place as that animal. Mandy's roommate Christy was the one who answered the door.  
  
"Is Mandy there?" I asked.  
  
"No." She said slowly, looking at me thoughtfully. "Look Pony, I don't think I should be telling you this, but you're a nice enough kid- a little rough around the edges, but your hearts in the right place..."  
  
"Telling me what?" I demanded, my heart in my throat.  
  
"Oh nevermind. You can find Mandy in Brian's room. It's number 89 in Risby." Christy said, and she closed the door in my face.  
  
I turned and started down the hallway- Brian was the one from the bar, the one who Mandy had been working on a history project with, so she must still be studying with him, but it seemed strange to me that she had been studying all day. She knew I was back, so why hadn't she made the effort to come and see me? I decided I would ask her that, as well as why she hadn't told me who Daniel really was! What was a relationship without trust, I thought as I walked down the steps of her dorm and started towards Brian's. And then I had another thought: I had been unfaithful to Mandy. It was me who was flouting the trust thing, not just Mandy. Maybe, I thought as I walked, this wasn't the perfect relationship I'd always thought it was. But then I pushed that thought away as I reached the dorm where Mandy was studying. It was the perfect relationship, we were just going to have to have a good, long talk. 


	21. 

TWENTY-ONE.  
  
I glanced at the numbers on the doors as I walked along the hall. The hall was alive with people either visiting or studying, and I smiled as I thought about how much I really did like college. I had to admit to having some apprehension when I'd first got into UCLA, but it was Darry who convinced me to go. "Pony, if I had of had the chance to go to college I would have gone. You're the smartest one in the family, don't blow this chance." Thinking about that got me to thinking about what had happened this weekend, and about how I had changed. Well maybe they were right, maybe I had changed. But was it that bad? Was growing up, maturing, really a bad thing? I didn't think it was anymore, and I was prepared to grow up and be the person Mandy wanted me to be. In fact there wasn't anything I wouldn't do for her, although beating the hell out of Daniel was probably asking a bit too much considering I was still pretty small and skinny. I found the room and knocked on the door. There was a moment before it was answered, and to my complete and utter shock Brian answered the door wearing only boxer shorts.  
  
"Pony?" He asked.  
  
"Brian?" I repeated, and then, as though by instinct, I pushed past him into the room. Mandy was lying in the bed, the covers pulled up to her chin looking horrified.  
  
"Jesus Christ." I managed.  
  
"Pony listen-" Mandy began, but I interrupted her.  
  
"I don't need to listen Mandy, I've got eyes." I said blinking back my tears. "I was coming to find you to tell you that I had been doing a lot of thinking over the last few days about us, about our relationship and how you wanted things to be different, how you wanted me to mature, and I was going to tell you that I thought I had. And that I had decided it wasn't exactly a bad thing. And I was also going to tell you I was leaving the frat because I worked out exactly who Daniel is."  
  
Brian was still standing there silently, watching me.  
  
"Pony, you really-" Mandy said, but I interrupted her again.  
  
"Save it Mandy. I don't want to hear it." I said, and I turned and hurried from the room before she could see me cry. I had tried to hard since I was a kid not to cry, and the last time I'd cried had been when I was a kid and there had been all the trouble with the socs. I'd lost one of my best friends in Johnny then, and now I felt as though I had lost another of my best friends, the one person who I cared about more than anything in the world. The one person who I had changed for, and perhaps even earnt the disgust of my friends and family for. I found a bench and sat down on it, tears burning my eyes even though I tried to blink them back. Why was it that every single time I ever thought that something good was happening to me, that things were finally going right, something bad happened to ruin it all? Like Johnny and Dally dying, like the troubles with Soda and Sandy, like this. Was I cursed or something?  
  
"Pony." Mandy's voice spoke softly behind me.  
  
"What do you want?" I asked harshly, and she hesitated. I could tell my words had hurt her, but did she really expect anything different?  
  
"Can I sit down?" She asked.  
  
"It's a free country." I replied.  
  
She sat down next to me and we sat in silence for awhile. I didn't look at her, but I knew she was crying too.  
  
"Why didn't you tell me who Daniel was? You let me move into the frat house with the prick?" I asked.  
  
"I didn't tell you because I didn't want you to cause trouble." Mandy replied. "I know your history Pony, and I know where you come from. If you knew about Daniel there was no way you'd just stand back and say nothing. I didn't want you to get yourself into trouble and kicked out of here. This is your dream Pony, and I didn't want to ruin it for you."  
  
"Oh, so you were thinking about me." I said, sarcastically. "Isn't that nice?"  
  
"Pony, I know you're hurt. I didn't ever want to hurt you." Mandy said, and she moved uncomfortably on the seat.  
  
"So you decided to cheat on me?" I asked, now turning to face her. "You didn't think that would hurt me? Or did you think what I didn't know wouldn't hurt me?"  
  
"It was nothing like that." Mandy said. "Even if I tried to explain it you'd never understand."  
  
"Wouldn't I?" I asked slowly. "Because of who I am? Because I'm not like you?"  
  
"NO!" Mandy practically yelled. "Because you haven't been through what I've been through. I know what I told you about Daniel, but I didn't give you the full details. It was pretty horrific what happened, and it wasn't just him, it was two of his friends too."  
  
"Eric?" I asked, praying he wasn't involved.  
  
"No, I don't even remember him being at camp." Mandy said frowning slightly. "But if you said that he must have been..anyway, he wasn't involved. When I told my parents they actually had the gall to call me a slut. They knew the parents of the boys who did this and they refused to believe they'd do that. I told you how they thought I was lying and how they basically confined me to the house for the rest of the summer right?"  
  
I nodded.  
  
"Well that wasn't all. They've constantly thrown it back in my faces, and even worse, Dad actually invited Daniel's parents over for dinner one night along with him. They told me if I so much as said anything about it I'd live to regret it, so I said nothing. After the meal Daniel asked whether I could show him round the house? I didn't want to of course, but my parents made me. And then when we were in one of the other rooms he started abusing me- telling me that he didn't think it was nice of me to have lied about what he did. I was shocked. I asked him whether he honestly believed he hadn't done anything wrong, and he laughed and said I was a female, and I wanted it. And he even put his hand on my breast then, but I shrugged it off and hurried from the room. I don't know what Daniel told his parents, but two days later I was called into see my parents were I was told that I was nothing more than a tease and that they were ashamed of me. Mom even suggested that I was probably with half the boys in town at the time, and it was about then that we moved and I met you. But they never, ever let me forget it. It's like a constant demon, knowing I didn't do anything wrong in my heart, but my brain telling me differently after so long of being told I had." Mandy finished.  
  
I was silent, not sure what to say. I felt sorry for her of course, it was a terrible thing to have to go through, but to not even have your own parents support at the same time was even worse. But how did this explain what she'd been doing with Brian?  
  
It was as if she had read my mind. "The idea of having a relationship with someone scared me so much Pony, even if I gave you the opposite impression. I know I probably made you think I wanted commitment-"  
  
"After being with me for a few years you could say that!" I interrupted her angrily. "Mandy, I thought you loved me."  
  
"I do." She said. "At least I think I do. Listen Pony, I know I've got some issues here, but I want to make it better. I want to be the girlfriend you've always thought I was."  
  
"Always thought you were?" I asked, my mind working fast. "Are you telling me this isn't the first time you've done something like this?"  
  
"I don't want to discuss that." Mandy said. "I need you to understand, I need you to forgive me."  
  
"Forgive you?" I was shocked. "You've cheated on me and you're asking my forgiveness. And you may have cheated on me more than one time."  
  
"I can't help it." Mandy said, tears running down her cheeks. "I get scared and I don't know what to think or what to do, and I-"  
  
"Go and sleep with other people?" I asked.  
  
"Do you love me Pony?" Mandy asked.  
  
The turn of the conversation caught me off guard and I hesitated before answering. "I thought I did."  
  
"If I got help, if things worked out, would you be able to forgive me? Would things be able to get back to normal?" Mandy asked.  
  
"I don't know." I admitted. "I don't know what's going to happen in the future."  
[A/N. And I am going to leave it there: the reason, well the next installment in "The Curtis Saga" will deal with Pony as an adult, and I think it would be better if there were a few surprises there. I hope you enjoyed the story, although I know it wasn't as good towards the end as it was at the start, but that's because I'm lazy, and I tend to get bored with stories I am writing towards the end. I've got so many ideas going round in my head that writing and concentrating on one story is pretty hard. Nevertheless look for the fourth installment coming soon.] 


End file.
